


Betting is bad for your Heart

by snowbaby921



Category: Original Work
Genre: Bullying, Gay Male Character, M/M, Original Character(s), Original Male Characters - Freeform, Physical Abuse, Teen Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-02
Updated: 2020-12-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:34:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 16
Words: 27,775
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27830836
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snowbaby921/pseuds/snowbaby921
Summary: Declan Sylvester is a 17 year old Senior , captain of his soccer team, who is very much gay and in the closet.   What happens when he gets bet to make the very out kid fall in love and sleep with him.  Will everything blow up in his face or will he find love along the way?Silas Reed is a 16 year old who is on the fast track to graduate early so he can live his own life. He came out along time ago with a lot of regrets and pain following.  What happens when the guy he has crushed on since stepping foot in the school finally notices him. Will he be crushed or will he finally have someone to love him?
Kudos: 6





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This story is also on Wattpad and Fictionpress.com under snowcrazy921

**Prologue** :

Well let’s start this little story off with my name, Silas Reed and I am a sixteen year old Junior. I thought my life was going great just the way I was living it. I had one Best friend, who I loved with all my heart, not like that. She is the only friend that I need in this life and this damn small town. My parents were not the best. I admit when I was growing up I thought I could tell them anything about me and they would still love and accept me. I truly believed that nothing could stop them from doing that, but I was wrong. 

When I was fourteen I came out as Gay to my parents and that ended any type of loving relationship I had with them. I can’t even remember the last time they talked to me or came to any school things that I had. It was like I was just a guest in the home and as long as I didn’t do anything to get noticed by them I was fine. It hurts to go from nightly dinners and laughs to the silent treatment and no eye contact. I got used to it but it still hurt. I ended up Dying my blonde hair a deep green with blue highlights, it made my Grey eyes stand out more. I got my eyebrow pierced and two small piercings under my bottom lip, snake bites. 

My Best friend Taylor thought it looked cool and wished she could go crazy like that. However unlike my parents that didn’t even notice me, her parents would freak the hell out. She said once she graduated and moved out she might try dying her hair but didn’t want to fight with her parents, I didn’t blame her, they were really close. 

Now back to what I was trying to say before. I didn’t think I needed anyone other than Taylor. Then something happened to change my thinking and it was both the greatest and worst thing in my life. My downfall was a senior and he made me fall then broke my heart. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. Declan

Chapter 1: (Declan)

“Hey Declan, are you even listening to us” I heard from my right. I slowly turned my head and glanced at my Best friend, Tommy. 

“What?” I snapped. I didn’t mean to snap, it was just I had a lot on my mind. I was leaning on my locker while Tommy and two of my other teammates were talking next to me. I had drowned them out when they started to talk about some girls that I didn’t care about. 

“Hey calm the Fuck down.” He snapped back at me and I winced. I hated when he got like that, he was always so quiet unless around us and he really never got mad at anything. “We were talking about the last time you had gotten laid.” He laughed, while I glared at him. 

“Why the Fuck would you care when the last time I got laid was?” I asked, crossing my arms across my chest, my eyes narrowed. 

“Well it has been awhile.” John started making the other two laugh. 

“Like I said why would you care? I can get laid whenever I want. Maybe I have and I just didn’t tell you.” I smirked at them. 

I started to get worried when I saw them smirk at each other and then stare down the hall for a moment. My heart stopped when I saw where they were looking and I knew it wasn’t going to be good. I saw the underclassmen standing at their lockers and just knew they were looking at him. Did they know, had they found out. What the hell was I going to do. I calmed my heart as I looked back at them, waiting for whatever they had planned. 

“Well if you can get anyone why not him.” Damon threw his thumb over his shoulder so people didn’t really know what he was doing. I followed the line of his thumb and Fuck I was right. 

“Why the hell would I want to get laid by a guy for starters?” I snapped at them. 

“Well you said anyone. We know he is gay so why not.” John laughed. 

I looked over at Tommy and only saw a small smile on his face. I wanted to punch him for not helping out with this. I wasn’t going to try and get laid by him, why did they have to pick him for. It was hard enough dating girls and doing stupid shit with them to try and keep my friends from finding out my secret. Now if I did this they would find out, unless. 

“What the hell do I get out of it?” I glared at them. Tommy was shaking his head now and I didn’t understand why. 

“ Well if you get him to sleep with you before the rivals game then we will all give you a hundred bucks each.” Damon said waiting for my reply, but before I could speak Tommy spoke up. 

“If you are really going to do this with him you need to do more. He won’t just sleep with you and you know it. You have to get him to fall in love with you before that kid will do anything.” He noted. 

I started to sweat. I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t. Sleeping with him was one thing. Leave the next day and ignore him, make him think he was just a one night stand and it would be over. Having to make him fall in love with me and then do it would break his heart. 

“I knew he wouldn’t be able to do it. All talk no action this one.” John laughed. 

“I’ll do it. The Rival game is three months away. I think I can do it before that time.” I said staring down the hall at the guy that they picked and my heart clenched in my chest. I felt a hand on my shoulder a few minutes later and looked up. I noticed that John and Damon were gone and I was left alone with Tommy, who looked a little upset. 

“You don’t have to do this. I put in the other part hoping it would deter you from doing this.” Tommy frowned at me. I shrugged his hand off my arm and moved back from him. 

“I have to do this or they will torment me for the rest of the year and I will never be able to live it down.” I said to him and he just shook his head and walked off. 

I leaned back against my locker and rested my head back, closing my eyes. I knew this was going to end bad and I just had to try to keep my true feelings out of this or I would be a laughing stock to the team. I knew Damon was going to tell the rest of them what they were having me do and even though it was a guy, if I didn’t do it they would make my life hell. If I act like I don’t care they will never find out. 

I knew the guy was smart and he only had one friend so I had to figure out what I was going to do to get him to trust me. Ideas were playing out in my head when the bell rang and I quickly pulled my books from my locker and ran to my next class. The guys gave me knowing smiles as I looked around the room. The assholes left only the seat next to him open and I had no choice but to sit there. He looked uncomfortable as I moved around the room and took the seat. 

I guess I should tell you a little back story, maybe I should have started with that somewhere before this whole thing but I just wasn’t thinking. My name is Declan Sylvester and the guy they want me to do this bet with is Silas Reed. He is a junior but in all senior classes. I think he is on track to actually graduate early. I first noticed him way back in his Freshman year when he first walked into the school, how could I not. He used to be Blonde and I thought that looked good on him with his striking grey eyes, then he came to school looking amazingly different. 

He still only had his one friend by his side and everyone stayed away from him even more after finding out he was gay. That frightened me a hell of a lot. It made the things that I did after that so much worse. For all of his freshman and Sophomore year my friends tormented him. I didn’t really do anything out right but I was always there and never stopped them. I don’t know why they stopped doing it this year but I think it was because they had been planning this damn bet for awhile. I should have known something was up. 

It made me think they knew my secret and were trying to out me. I was so scared that the only thing I could think of was agreeing to do this so they couldn’t use not doing it against me. I would get past this and maybe in the end he wouldn’t find out about it being a bet and I could finally be who I really am and be with who I wanted, which is him.


	3. Declan

Chapter 2- Declan

Running across the field was the only peace I got everyday. I would work out every morning on the soccer field for an hour before school started. It helped me clear my mind and not think about anything going on in my life. Today however I only ran for a half an hour before everything came flooding into my head about yesterday. I slowly sank to my knees in the middle of the field and held back the tears that wanted to come out of my eyes. I watched Silas the whole time yesterday, trying to find a good time to talk to him. He always walked with his head down, even when he was with his friend. The one time he looked up and caught my green eyes with his grey I felt like I was dying. I smiled at him and he looked scared and turned around almost running away from me. That made my heart drop, this was never going to work. 

I looked at my watch and noticed I had been on the ground for twenty minutes. I quickly got up and went to the locker room to take a shower before classes started. To my surprise Tommy was sitting in there waiting for me. I groaned and went to my locker to grab my towel. 

“What is it Tommy, I really need to shower and get ready for class.” I said trying to walk around him now that he was standing in front of me. 

“Why are you doing this bet Dec?” He asked, saying his nickname for me, making me flinch. 

“The guys will never let me live it down if I don’t. You know this.” I said moving around him and into the shower stall. He followed me, annoying the hell out of me. 

“I know that isn’t the real reason. You both are just going to get hurt from this and I don’t want that.” He said, making me look back at him confused. 

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” I almost screamed. 

“You know what it means. Just be careful with him Dec.” He said and walked away. I just shook my head and took my shower. 

During lunch I didn’t see Silas anywhere and decided to walk around the school to look for him. I saw his friend leave the library and I followed my hunch and went into the room. I moved around the stacks and finally found him, sitting on the floor at the very far back of the room. I stood there watching him for a moment. He was reading a book with ear buds in his ear, probably listening to music at the same time. He was biting his bottom lip, back and forth between his piercings. I felt something stir within me and almost bolted out of the room. Instead I walked over and stood over him, waiting for him to notice me. When he did he moved so fast I almost laughed. He ripped the ear buds out of his ears, threw his book on the floor, stood up with arms covering his face. It made my heart hurt to see him so scared of me. 

“Hey Silas, calm down. Please?” I practically begged him. I hated to see him like this. His arms slowly lowered from his face and wrapped around his waist. His head slowly lifted and his eyes met mine, my god he was so gorgeous. 

“What do you want Sylvester?” ouch that hurt. I smiled at him again trying to show I was not going to hurt him, he just tried backing up into the book shelf even more than he already was.

“I swear I’m not here to hurt you. I, shit, I need your help.” I said making it look like it was hard for me to ask him this. I figured the only way I could be with him alone would be to ask for help with my work. I wasn’t failing anything but he didn’t need to know that. 

“My help. With what?” He asked suspicion, lacing his words, eyebrow cocking up in interest.

“Well I need to be passing all my classes to stay on the soccer team. I really don’t want to lose my captain spot. I’m failing math at the moment and you are the only person I know that is really acing the class.” I said running my hands in my hair. 

“Really?” He asked. Shit did he know I was actually second in the class right below him.

“Yeah. I have been getting distracted with Soccer and not really pulling my weight in the class. I just can’t get some of the problems down. Would you please be willing to help me out?” I said hoping it was believable. 

“I guess I could tutor you. You have to be at all the times we set up or I will stop right then. I’m not going to waste my time if you are not going to put your time in to do it.” He said, his arms finally come down to his side. I smile brightly at him and he slowly smiles back. Wow I need to make him do that more often. 

“Alright. How about first meeting today after school. I don’t have practice. We can figure out the other times at that time.” I said hoping he would agree and he wasn’t busy already. 

“Let me make sure that Taylor has a ride home first. Um, can I get your number so I can let you know wh.” I quickly cut him off handing him my phone at the same time.

“Put your number in and call your phone.” He was shocked at my quickness and gently took the phone from my hand, our fingers brushing together making my breath hitch. He quickly put his number in and then I heard his phone ring. He clicked the end call button and handed my phone back to me. 

“Hope we can meet later. Just text me to let me know.” I smiled as the bell rang. “I’ll see you later.” I smiled and before I knew what the hell I was doing I pulled him into a hug and thanked him. The look of shock on his face when I quickly pulled away was priceless. 

When I made it to class I sat next to Tommy with a smile on my face. He looked over confused at me and leaned over to whisper. 

“What are you smiling at?” He asked. 

“I have set up tutoring from Silas. So I will have him alone with me. First step, check.” I laughed and I saw Tommy shake his head and lean away from me. What the hell was his problem?


	4. Silas

*************Warning************ Mentions of physical abuse

this is Silas texting  
This is Declan

Chapter 3- Silas

My heart nearly stopped when I was in the library. I couldn’t understand why Declan Sylvester wanted my help with Math. I thought he was passing everything but apparently I was wrong. I remember the first time I saw him my freshman year. He was a year older than me and played on the soccer team. He was insanely popular and had every girl after him by this time. I couldn’t help but have my eyes follow him everywhere. I knew I might have been gay before this and after realizing how I felt about Declan I knew for sure after. That was when I came out to my family and everything went downhill after that. 

I didn’t even know how everyone at school found out, the only people I told were my parents and Taylor. I knew she wouldn’t ever tell anyone what I told her. It had to be my parents somehow, I knew they hated me after that but to out their own son to everyone was the worst feeling, so I tried to believe it wasn’t them. After I came back to school with my Hair dyed and the Piercings that's when the upperclassman started to harass me. 

I would get cornered anywhere I was alone and they were around. They never did anything with Taylor around me. I would get punched and kicked. Slammed into the walls and lockers. One time someone hit me in the face so hard one of my lip piercings pulled out, blood going everywhere. I would see Declan just standing off to the side or behind whoever was doing this shit to me. I wondered why, if he wasn’t going to join, why wouldn’t he help me. Why was he even ever there. My crush on him slowly went away and by the end of Sophomore year I thought I was over him. 

Then he had to come into the damn library and start to tear my walls down. I could never say no to someone that wanted help with their schooling. I wanted everyone to get the chance to pass and be able to excel. I may have been a junior but I doubled up my junior and senior classes and was going to be able to graduate this year. I was afraid to do it with my tormentors but the faster I could get the hell out of this school the faster I could get away from my parents and out of this damn town. 

After I left the library I quickly went to class and found Taylor sitting in the back, so I ran over and sat with her. She looked up at me surprised at my actions. I closed my eyes and held my breath for a few moments before I told her everything. 

“Do you have a ride home after school? If not I will tell him to meet another day.” I said, not knowing why I was so anxious. 

“I can call my mom, it’s fine. I just want you to be careful. It seems weird that his friends stopped harassing you this year and now he suddenly is looking to you for help.” She worried. 

“I will be careful. I’m just going to meet him in the library and help him with his math work. I just. I hope I can do this.” I said hanging my head and playing with my fingers. I felt her hand go to my shoulder and relaxed a little. 

“You can do it. Just please for the love of god do not start crushing on him again. I can’t take seeing you so upset.” She smiled at me and I smiled back. 

“That crush ended and will never come back. He never once told his friends to stop but he never joined in either. I guess that was part of the reason I agreed. If he had joined I don’t think I would be able to help him.” I said hoping I would be able to keep my word on that one. “I’m going to text him to let him know to meet me at the library after.” I said and I heard her gasp.

“He gave you his number?” She asked, eyes wide and a smile on her face.

“Yes. Only for tutoring things. I’m not going to write to him about anything else.” I said and quickly pulled my phone out. 

Hey this is Silas. Just letting you know if you are still free after school can meet up in the library for tutoring

I was about to put my phone away, thinking it would take him a bit to respond knowing he was also in class. Before I was able to put it in my pocket it vibrated, surprising me. 

Great see you after school. Thank you again Silas <3 

I sat staring at my phone. Specifically at the heart at the end of my name. I felt my own flutter at the sight of it. What the hell was that. 

“Are you alright?” Taylor asked next to me. I tipped my phone so she could see and she started to laugh. “Maybe he just does that at the end of all his messages.” She laughed out. 

“Really? He is a jock on the soccer team. I don’t think he goes around sending hearts to those guys.” I snapped. “Why the hell would he send that?” 

“I don’t know. Just be careful please.” Just then the bell rang and we moved out of the classroom. The rest of the day I couldn’t get that damn text heart out of my head. I was second guessing going to the library after school. I even pulled my phone out from my pocket a couple of times, about to text him to forget about it. The final bell rang and I slowly got up from my desk and made my way to the library. Taylor cautioned me again before we left the class but I couldn’t stop myself from going. 

I don’t know how he did it but he was sitting at a table in the back when I got there. His head was down, looking at his phone. His Hair was hanging down in front of his eyes and a small smile was playing on his lips. He was leaning back in his chair and went to stretch, making his shirt life up and show off his stomach. My mouth dropped open. I saw his muscles flexing and had to close my eyes to stop myself from running off. When I opened my eyes he was sitting, looking at me with a small smile. I slowly made my way over to the table and sat across from him. Wanting nothing more than to just leave, but knew I couldn’t.


	5. Declan

Chapter 4- Declan

After school I sat in the library and was looking at my phone. I was looking at the text I had sent Silas and was smiling. I sent a little heart at the end of his name hoping he didn’t freak out about it and still showed up. I closed my eyes and stretched my back out. I had been sitting here since last class since I had a free period. I didn’t want to miss Silas if he came and didn’t see me here. When I ended the stretch I looked to the door and saw him standing there with his eyes closed. He looked torn and I waited hoping he wouldn’t turn around. When I saw his eyes slowly open I smiled at him and watched as he walked over and sat across from me. 

“Hey thank you so much for this.” I said noticing he wasn’t looking at me and I reached across the table without thinking and placed my hand over one of his. He flinched and pulled his hand away, snapping his eyes up to me. 

“Why are you really wanting my help Declan.” He snapped at me making me flinch away. 

“I need help with math.” I said trying to sound convincing. I knew it didn’t work because he started to grab his bag and stand up, Making me stand quickly, knocking my chair over. He stopped moving and flinched back away from me. 

“I’m not going to hurt you Silas. Please just.” I didn’t know what to say. I pulled at my hair with my hands and just sat back down. If he wanted to leave I couldn’t stop him. This damn bet was putting me into a hard place. I wanted to just get it over with but he would be hard to crack. 

“You don’t need my help do you? Is this some kind of prank or joke you are doing? Get me to trust you and have your friends jump me or something?” He spat out with so much hatred. I hung my head down and shook my head no. 

“Then what the hell is it?” He snapped. I had never heard him angry before. He was always so quiet. He started to walk away and around the stacks trying to head to the library door. I began to panic, I quickly got up and ran after him. Catching up really easily. I grabbed his hand and spun him around and before I could think I kissed him. 

My lips moved slowly over his as one hand still held his and my other lifted to caress his face. He didn’t respond at first but then I felt him slowly move his lips with mine. I moaned quietly, this felt so good so perfect. It ended way too soon as he realized what he was doing and pushed me away from him. His grey eyes wide with fear. He was scared of me. 

“What the hell was that?” He snapped, wiping his mouth with his sleeve, making my heart drop. Of course he wouldn’t like me, he hated me. 

“I’m sorry for doing it like that. I didn’t want to force you into kissing me. I just didn’t know what to do to make you stay. I just really.” He interrupted me. 

“So you think kissing me will make me want to stay here and put up with your crap? You have got to be kidding me. Just because I am gay doesn’t mean I want every idiot to kiss me.” He spat out and fled the library. I hung my head down and didn’t know what to do. I took my phone out and pulled his number up. 

Silas, I am so so sorry for kissing you that way. I wanted to do it, but not like that. Please just talk to me. I am sorry.

I put my phone away and was hoping that he would either write me back, call or come talk to me. Hours passed as I waited in my bedroom. I knew then he wouldn’t talk to me again. I had blown it. I wouldn’t tell the guys right away. It’s not worth it. I took my phone out and wrote him one last time. 

I know my friends tormented you for two years with me on the sidelines watching. I didn’t know what to do or how to stop them without them finding out about me. I have never said this to anyone, but I feel like I need to say it to you so you understand. oh god. I’m gay. I’ve liked you since you came to this school but when my friends freaked out when they found out you were gay I froze. I am so so sorry. I will leave you alone now. Please be happy. <3

I hit send. I knew this could come back and bite me in the ass. Everything I said to him was true. I could twist it around for the guys saying I lied to him but all I wanted was to have him by my side or in my arms. I stayed up most of the night hoping he would write me back but he never did. My heart and head hurt. When I woke up in the morning there were dried tears on my face and I had a pounding headache. My mom thought I was sick and wanted me to stay home but I couldn’t. I had to face this. 

When I got to the school I felt like crap. I looked around trying to see if I could find Silas and gauge his reaction. See if he had any outward reaction to my messages but I didn’t see him or his friend anywhere. I spotted Tommy at my locker and slowly made my way over. 

“Where the hell have you been. I went to the field this morning and you weren’t there.” He said. I just shook my head and grabbed my things for class from my locker. I started to move away from him but he grabbed my arm and held me back.

“What is wrong with you. You look like someone just killed you dog.” He started making me yank my arm from his hand and walk away. This was partly his fault. That damn bet was going to kill me. I know it. A week went by with me acting the same way. Silas made it a point to not look at me, not be in the same hallway with me or anywhere I was alone. The one time I caught his eye he glared at me and looked away. 

“Seems like you are failing Declan.” I looked over and saw Damon smirking at me. 

“What ever.” I replied and tried to listen to the teacher talking. 

“Well if you don’t get this done you will owe use that money. Can’t wait to take your money from you.” He laughed.  
“What the fuck is wrong with you. Do you get a kick out of fucking with him? Or do you like him yourself and are just too chicken shit to do anything about it and make me the fall guy?” I finally snapped. I looked around and everyone was staring at me. Fuck. I looked around and thanked god Silas wasn’t here. He would definitely know something was going on if he heard that. Next thing I know I was on the floor. That prick just punched me. Without me looking. I quickly got up and charged at him but was stopped with arms holding me back. I flung Tommy off of me and stormed to the door. 

“Fuck you guys.” I left after that not caring what they think. 

I ended up redeeming myself with them at soccer practice. The rest of the team were talking about everything and when I came in the questions started.  
“Why did you guys fight like that? Do you really have a thing for the little fag Declan?” Was thrown at me and I flinched 

“You know this is all a bet. One of those fuckers in there are going to go back and tell Silas about this. I needed to make it look good. So punching me was a good thing for me Damon. Thank you for that.” I smirked, kicking myself the whole time in my head. Just as I was about to throw my phone in my locker to get to the field it went off. 

We need to talk. Library after your practice.

Ok will see you then.

I didn’t leave a heart. I had a feeling this was going to turn out bad so just let it go. Practice sucked.


	6. Declan

Chapter 5- Declan

After getting my ass handed to me on the field I quickly showered and made my way to the library. My heart was pounding so fast in my chest I thought it was going to come right out and land on the floor in front of me. I have never been so nervous about something in my whole life. I peeked into the room and didn’t see Silas there yet and wondered where he could be. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath before I walked into the room and made my way to the back table. Before I was able to reach it I was grabbed and pulled to the side, into the small nook. Silas was standing there, arms now folded across his chest and looking pissed. 

“What the hell was with you in class today?” he snapped at me. 

“I heard what you did to your friend, got into a fight in class. Everyone is saying it was about me. That whatever this is, this thing you are trying to do with me is all a joke.” He was fuming. I could tell he was trying his hardest not to yell. I slowly took a step forward and tried to take his hands off his body and hold them but he backed away from me. I hung my head down and just shook my head. 

“All I wanted was to get closer to you and get to know you. I’m sorry I lied to you about needing help with my work but that is the only way I could think of to get you to be anywhere near me.” I told him. Everything that I said was true but not the whole truth. “Did you read my text messages at all?” I asked.

“No. I deleted them. I’m really mad at you. I know something is going on and I don’t trust you.” As he was talking I was fumbling with my phone and brought up the last message I sent him, the one where I told him I was gay, and put the phone in front of him. 

“Please read it. Please.” I whispered as he slowly grabbed my phone. I saw his eyes scan over the words and his eyes scrunch in confusion. He shoved the phone into my chest when he was done making me confused. 

“Don’t make me laugh Sylvester. You are the least gay person on earth. Just leave me alone already.” He said and turned around, ready to walk away. I quickly, but gently grabbed his wrist. 

“Please just look at me.” I pleaded with him and it hurt so bad when he ripped his hand away from me and walked away. I knew this was going to be hard but to have him not believe me when I finally told someone the truth about myself was the worst thing. I just stood there for a while trying to get my heart to stop racing. When I felt like I could walk without breaking down I left the school and went home. 

When I walked into my house my mother was sitting in the kitchen waiting for me. She called me over and told me to sit down so I did. When I looked at her she looked worried and I didn’t know what she was so worried about. 

“Declan, baby, Is everything alright with you?” She asked, putting her hand over mine. 

“Yes Mom, I’m fine. Why are you asking?” I replied. 

“The school called today and said you and your friend got into a fight in class. That Damon even punched you. You have never been in fights at school or anywhere, let alone with one of your friends, or team mates.” She told me and I swear I could kill whoever called her. 

“He was harassing me about something and when I called him out on it he got mad and Punched me. Tommy stopped me from hitting him back and I left the room.” I told her. I never really lied to my Mother before so I told her part of the truth at least. 

“You do know you can tell me anything right.” She told me and I felt sick. I started to think about Silas and everything going on with him. How he would never trust me or speak to me again. How I would never have the chance to be with him and then I felt the tears on my face. 

“Oh Declan what is wrong?” My Mother asked while moving around the table to pull me into a hug. 

“I’m gay. I’m sorry. I tried not to be. I tried to be with girls and be normal and what you would want me to be. I tried so hard but now he hates me and he will never trust me. I don’t know what to do Mom. I’m so sorry. Please please forgive me.” I cried into her shoulder. I knew she probably hated me now but I needed her.

“Oh Declan. You have nothing to be forgiven for or sorry about. You are my son and I love you. Your Father loves you too. Now you are normal so stop talking that way. Who hates you Declan?” I pulled back to see my mom smiling at me. I took a tissue off the table and wiped my face with it before watching her sit back down. 

“There is a boy in school, he is a year younger but so smart he is graduating with me. I noticed him right when he was a freshman and haven’t been able to get my eyes off of him all these years. He’s everything.” I said and my Mother was smiling brightly. 

“Well what is his name?” She asked.

“Silas Reed, but he will never trust me. My friends tormented him for two years when he came out. I didn’t do anything to stop them in fear they would figure me out as well.” I hung my head in shame. 

“Oh Declan. We will fix this.” She stood up from the table and grabbed her phone. 

“What are you doing Mom.” She just smiled and dialed her phone and put it to her ear. 

“Hello Nancy. Yes I’m doing well. I was wondering if you and your family would like to have dinner over at ours tomorrow night. Yeah. Oh you don’t have to bring anything. Just you, your husband and your Son. Oh... Well I have a son around the same age so he won’t be a bother. That’s alright,I’m sure they will get along. Great I will see you all tomorrow night.” She put her phone down a moment later and smiled at me. 

“Mother what did you just do?” I asked her. 

“Well I know The Reed’s and just invited them over to dinner tomorrow night. There is something off with the way she was talking about Silas however. I will have to pay attention tomorrow night when they are here.” That had my attention. All of that did. 

“Mom no. There is so much more going on. The guys. Shit. The guys made a bet about me and Silas. I only agreed because it would mean I would have been able to spend time with him without the guys getting any ideas. It's so messed up. I don’t know what to do. The guys will find out I’m gay and Silas will find out about the bet and hate me even more than he does.” I place my head in my hands and just want to scream.

“Well tomorrow night you will tell Silas about the bet and explain to him what you just told me about wanting to be around him. Hopefully he will eventually come around and see how special you are. Then the next time you see your friends, after you tell Silas, you tell them the bet is over and pay them whatever it is you lost. Then if they threaten to tell Silas about it well he will already know. Then you work on getting that boy to trust you.” My mother told me. She was the smartest woman I will ever know. I gave her a hug and went to my room. Sleep was calling me, I didn’t care how early it was.


	7. Declan

Chapter 6- Declan

It was the next night and I was sitting up in my room on my bed with my head in my hands. I was trying to think of what I was going to say to silas. This was something that was going to be harder than I wanted it to be. I knew by the end of it Silas will most likely never want anything to do with me ever again. I knew I had to do this however. I had to get this bet set in the past and end it tonight. Losing the bet will be easier than losing Silas, even though I never had him to begin with. 

I heard the doorbell ring and quickly went out my door and looked down the stairs. I saw a man and woman enter the house and they didn’t look nice at all. I am so glad my parents were the ones that I have. Then slowly with his head down Silas came in behind them. He lifted his head and looked around but when his eyes landed back on his parents scowling faces his eye went back to the floor. 

What the hell was going on? My heart dropped at his defeated look. The strong boy I saw in the library yesterday was gone, and it hit my heart hard. I watched as they all went into the living room and heard my Mother talking to them. When I heard her tell Silas that he could come up here to find her son I ran back into my room and closed my door. My heart was racing. I was afraid of what he would do when he came in and saw it was me sitting here. I then heard a light knock on my door and a small hello. When I opened the door his head moved up my body making me shiver from those eyes but the moment they reached mine the worst look came across his face and he started to turn around. 

“No wait.” I spat out watching him stop. 

“What is my family doing here?” He snarled at me, making me flinch.

“My mom knows your mom I guess. She just told me today they were coming over. I’m glad you're here, I really needed to talk to you. Can I please just explain everything and then you can leave.” I practically whispered and let out the breath I was holding when he nodded and walked over to my bed to sit down.

“You have five minutes then I am leaving. I’m not staying here with you or them.” This made me want to question about his parents but just quickly sat next to him, looking him in the eyes. 

“Now you have to promise me one thing. Please do not leave until I am done. I know you will want to punch me and leave right away after the first thing I say but please just wait until I am done.” I begged and he only nodded so I guess that was a yes. 

“The guys from the team thought it would be funny to bet me that I could get anyone to sleep with me. I was going to say no but then I saw the way they were looking at you and agreed and that's when they choose you.” I looked up and saw him fidgeting on the bed, hands balled into fists. I was glad he was keeping his promise however. 

“I only agreed because I have liked you since you came into this school. The first time I saw you I wanted to get to know you but then you came out and everyone was making it hard for you. My friends, the asses they are, tormented you. I wanted to stop them so badly but I didn’t want them to figure out I was gay, that I liked you. This bet was going to give me the chance to be around you and get to know you. I was hoping it would give me the courage to come out and then I could be with you. I was never going to go through with the bet. I would have stopped it before it got that far. I just wanted.” Before I could finish He bolted up from the bed and turned around to me. His face was beat red and I could see the nails digging into his palm. 

The next thing I knew my face hurt and he was gone. He had punched me and I was laying on the bed now. I slowly curled up into a ball and forced myself not to cry. I deserved this for even thinking the bet was a good idea to be near him. I had hurt him and I had never wanted to. I heard my bedroom door open a little while later and felt my bed dip down. 

“Oh Declan. I saw Silas run out of here. Are you alright?” My mom asked. 

“I hopefully will get their mom. He will never speak to me again and I’m just going to have to live with it. Now I’m going to talk to the guys tomorrow. I need to tell them everything. Some of them will probably never speak to me again either but whatever. I did this to myself.” I told her. 

“That boy's parents are not kind. They said some things about him. I wanted to throw them out early but I wanted you to have time to talk to Silas. Keep an eye on him at school. I’m afraid for him.” I shot up from the bed and just looked at her.

“What do you mean?” I asked her.

“I don’t know if they physically hurt him but I am pretty sure they verbally and mentally do. I just wish that I had some kind of proof to help the boy.” My mother never said stuff like this so I knew it must be bad. 

“I will watch out for him. Thanks mom.” I hugged her and she left. Leaving me to go to sleep and wait until tomorrow when I knew more shit was going to hit the fan. 

The next day I waited in the locker room for the rest of the team to get there for morning practice. Tommy came in with John and Damon as the rest followed a little bit after. I slowly took a couple of breaths while looking at them. I hoped Tommy would still be with me after this but I wasn’t sure about the rest. Tommy also joined in on tormenting Silas but I wasn’t sure if it was because it was his team or he really didn’t like him. 

“Hey guys. I have some stuff to say.” I spoke up, making everyone look up at me. 

“You finally gave up on that kid. Thought you were going to turn on us.” Damon laughed making the rest including Tommy laugh. That made my heart drop. 

“He wouldn’t have been able to turn someone that was already like him to begin with.” I said with confidence. I was shaking like a leaf on the inside, bracing myself for whatever would come my way. 

“What the Hell does that mean?” John spat out making me glance at him. 

“I think Declan here is trying to tell us he has always been Gay and has an actually crush on little ol’ Silas.” Tommy spat out with such hatred, shit I just lost my best friend. “Isn’t that right?” 

“I’m done with this bet. Here is the damn money you guys want so damn bad.” I threw it all on the bench. “And to answer your question Tommy, yes I have known I was gay for awhile now and have always liked Silas. Knowing how ignorant you guys are I just kept my mouth shut. I’m not hiding myself any longer. I suggest you leave Silas alone also.” I spat out grabbing my gear and walking out of the locker room. 

My life just changed in a second. I just lost all my friends, the guy I liked and I knew the rest of the school would know before lunch. At least I still had my parents and Soccer.


	8. Declan

**** Warning Verbal and Physical abuse in this chapter ******

Chapter 7- Declan

As I figured the whispering started around the second period that day. The ugly looks and pointing, heads leaning into each other and laughing as I walked past people in the halls. I held my head high as I walked around the school. I wasn’t going to give these assholes the satisfaction to see me break. As I walked into the lunch hall everyone stopped talking and just looked over at me. I scanned the room and saw Silas and his friend sitting in the far corner staring at me. Silas’s eyes were different from everyone else’s. Everyone else looked at me with disgusted or disbelief, he however looked at me with hatred. That was when I hung my head and decided to turn around and leave. I was suddenly not hungry anymore and just wanted to get to my next class. This day was just going from bad to worse with every step I took. 

Sitting in the back of the class as everyone else walked in. Each and everyone faltered in their steps as they came in. Silas came in almost last and the only seats were next to me or one right in the front. I knew he hated to sit in the front of the class so thought that he would sit next to me, my hope rising that I may be able to try and talk to him. My heart dropped as I saw him shake his head and sit in the front seat. He really did hate me. My heart dropped and splintered a little as I tried to calm my breathing. 

Tommy and Damon were the last as always, Usually I was with them but of course that wasn’t going to be any longer. I started to freak out when I realized I would be stuck sitting between them as the only seats left were on either side of me. I tried to keep my breathing even and not panic, but I saw the looks exchanged between the two and knew this class was going to be a very long one. 

“How you doing Fag?” I heard Damon spit out as he sat down in one seat. I looked up at him just to have my head pushed down and hit my desk from my other side. 

“Maybe that will knock you back to normal.” Tommy laughed as he took his seat. 

“What the fuck guys. Can you be more ignorant?” I spat out, rubbing the side of my head. Tommy leaned over his desk, grabbing my arm hard.

“Well maybe you should have just ended the bet and kept your mouth shut. Would have been a hell of alot better not knowing your a Fag for Silas!” He spat Silas' name out with such hatred I had never heard from him before. I looked into his eyes and was shocked to see that he was upset, not angry. I knew my best friend's looks. He wasn’t angry, what is up with him.

“Tommy?” I whispered his name, watching as his eyes softened a little but then grew upset again. 

“Don’t fucking talk to me.” He dug his fingers into my arm making me hiss out in pain before he moved away from me. I began rubbing my arm, looking forward and seeing people whispering things to Silas. I saw him shaking his head side to side as they continued to speak to him, until the teacher told everyone to be quiet. Finally after what seemed like hours class was over. I had a break now and could hide away somewhere. I was very wrong. I saw Silas run out of the room and tried to quickly catch up to him.

As I rounded a corner I was grabbed by my arms and my knee was kicked, making me fall to my knees as I was still being held. I looked up and saw Damon and John holding me. Then I heard a cry and looked up, my heart dropped as I saw Tommy holding Silas by the back of his neck, he looked to be squeezing making Silas cry out in pain. 

“Let him go. Leave him alone Tommy.” I spat out only to get punched in the face by John. 

“Shut the fuck up traitor.” He spat at me grabbing my hair and making me look over at Silas and Tommy. 

“I can see what you see in him Dec. If you look at him just right he does look like a girl.” Tommy then used his other hand to pull on Silas hair making his head sharply pull back. He cried out again and I struggled against my hold. My eyes widened in shock as Tommy then placed his lips over Silas’s kissing him. 

“What the fuck are you doing Tommy. Stop.” I felt a kick to my stomach and almost bent over in pain but John’s hold on my hair stopped that from happening. 

“I want to see why you are so fascinated in him. Do you think this bet was a sudden thing Dec? I have seen how you have looked at him since sophomore year. It was making me sick. No one else believed me so I figured I had to prove it. I didn’t think it would be so damn easy though.” He then started to run one of his hands down Silas chest, making him whimper. I watched as the hand went under Silas shirt, moving back up his stomach, I could see his bare skin and I was getting pissed. 

“Leave him alone. He has never done anything to you. Why do you hate him so much.” I yelled, trying my hardest to get the hell out of the hold on me. I needed to help Silas. I needed to get Tommy away from him. 

“Well if I can’t have what I want, I will take what you want. If I close my eyes I think I can believe he is a girl.” He proceeded to run his tongue up the side of Silas next, as his hand went down to the front of his pants. Silas was squirming and crying now, trying to get away. Tommy smirked as he pulled on Silas hair and began to walk towards an empty classroom. “Hold him there boys, This won’t take long.” He said as they disappeared into the room. 

“Let me go. What are you guys letting him do? You can’t let him do this.” I was screaming. Why was no one else coming into the hall? They had to have heard the yelling. 

“Oh when he is done with your little fixation you will not want him any longer.” John laughed. My heart sank. He wasn’t going to, no he couldn’t. My anger finally boiled over and I pulled all the strength I had and ended up pulling my arm out of John’s hold and punched Damon onto his ass. I quickly got up and kicked John in the groin and ran into the classroom. Thankfully Tommy didn’t lock it. When I got into the room I almost froze at what I saw. 

Tommy had Silas turned around laying flat on his stomach over a desk with his pants down. Tommy was just trying to get his pants down also while talking to a crying and screaming Silas. 

“He is not going to want to touch you after I have you. If I can’t have him you sure the hell are not going to touch him.” I heard Tommy spit out, What the fuck. I didn’t say anything, I wanted the upper hand on this one. I quickly ran over and grabbed Tommy by the back of his hair, swinging him around and just started punching him in the face, not letting him drop after the hits. 

“Declan, Declan, DEC. Stop your going to kill him.” I heard Silas yelling as he was trying to pull my arm to stop me. 

“He deserves to die. How dare he try to.... Try to do that to you.” I went to swing again but Silas grabbed on with both his hands. I dropped Tommy to the floor and pulled Silas into my chest. I knew I was crying but I didn’t care. 

I heard Tommy spitting onto the floor as he was trying to get up. I pulled away from Silas and looked into his eyes, it just made me cry a little more seeing the pain in them. 

“Are you alright? How badly are you hurt? He didn’t? He didn’t ?” I tried to ask but I couldn’t get the words out. 

“No He didn’t you stopped him. My head hurts from him pulling my hair but other than that I’m just shaken, why did he want to do that?” He asked tears flowing down his face. I turned to Tommy pushing him back down onto his ass before he could get up, pants around his ankles. 

“You are disgusting. How could you do that to someone?” I spat out at my once best friend. His look gave me chills. It was a cross between sad and evil.


	9. Declan

Chapter 8- Declan

“I couldn’t stand it any longer. You are always watching and staring at him.” Tommy spat out looking at Silas. “You couldn’t even see what was right in front of you all these years. You had to want someone that you didn’t even know.” 

“What the hell are you talking about Tommy?” I spat out staring at him.

“He likes you.” Silas whispered. I whipped my head around to look at him and he looked sad. I turned back to Tommy and he looked the same way. 

“Is that true?” I whispered. Tommy nodded his head not even looking at me. 

“And what, that gives you the right to try and rape him.” I pointed at Silas. “He has never done anything to you. Is that why you guys always beat the shit out of him?” I yelled. 

“Yes. I knew you liked him. I thought if you could see how weak he was you would stop being obsessed over the little shit.” He screamed at me.

“You do know you could have just talked to me Tommy. If you had asked me if I was gay and told me you wouldn’t hate me for it, I may have told you I was. You are the ones that prevented me from saying anything. The shit you put him through, I knew my friends would hate me.” I spat out making him look at me. “ I don’t know if I would have liked you back, we will never know that now because you and I are never going to be friends again after what you just pulled.” I turned around and lightly grabbed Silas by the arm walking him towards the door to leave. 

“Declan, wait. Please. I wouldn’t have taken it all the way. I was just trying to scare him. Keep him away from you.” Tommy was pleading. I spun back around seeing him trying to pull his pants back up.

“Bull shit. You were in a blind rage you wouldn’t have stopped. I know you Tommy. I know how you are. You would have hurt him just to hurt me. Now it is up to Silas what he is going to do about it. If I were him I would report your ass.” I spat out and looked at Silas, he was shaking his head no. 

“Are you sure? He can get in alot of trouble for this. You won’t have to deal with him any longer.” I asked. 

“I just want this to be over.” He whispered. I pulled him into a hug and he wrapped his arm around my waist. 

“I’ll make sure this doesn’t happen again. He, They will never touch you again.” I whispered to him, kissing the top of his head, trying not to freak out. “Wait by the door for me please.” I said and he nodded, pulling slowly away from me and walking away. 

“If I ever catch you or the guys laying even a finger on him again I will not hesitate to beat the fuck out of all of you and than have you hauled off to jail. Do you understand me Tommy.” He nodded his head. “OH and If I were you I would quit the Team, because if you don’t I will make every practice, every game a living hell for you.” He nodded once more and turned around walking over to Silas. 

“Let’s go somewhere and talk, Please?” I asked and he nodded. I walked him out of the class room and noticed that John and Damon were nowhere to be seen. Tommy better tell them what I said if I don’t see them first. 

As we walked down the hall together, I held Silas’s hand, not caring about the looks or whispered following us. I kept my eyes out for anyone on the team. I wasn’t going to let them hurt him anymore. My stomach and head hurt from the hits I took but I was trying not to show my pain. Once we made it to the back of the Library I let his hand go and started to pace the floor. I couldn’t think right, I didn’t want to start yelling so I was trying to calm myself down. As my adrenaline wore off my stomach started to hurt worse and I rested my hand on it, leaning onto the wall, I suddenly felt a hand on my shirt and turned around. I watched as Silas slowly lifted my shirt up and a low gasp escaped his lips, his eyes widened. I looked down and saw the big bruise starting to form. My breath hitched as he brought his other hand up to my skin and slowly, torturously, skimmed his fingers over the bruise. 

“I’m so sorry.” He whispered, making my eyes snap to his face. I felt my hand move up as it touched his face, bringing him to look at my face and not my stomach. 

“You have nothing to be sorry for Si.” I saw him shiver at the nickname, making me smile. “They are just assholes. I am the one that is sorry and couldn’t stop him beforehand. 

“You couldn’t have known what he was going to do. I should have talked to you. I shouldn’t have pushed you away like I did, then maybe we could have avoided them together.” He whispered. 

“You had every right to be mad at me and push me away. I never should have agreed to that bet. I should have just had the courage to talk to you on my own.” I saw him smile at me, making me smile in return.

“It would have taken me time to believe you but at least it would have been on your own.” He whispered looking down again. I lifted his chin up to me and looked into his eyes. 

“I need to ask this before I do something stupid like that idiot. I will never make you do anything you don’t want to do.” I told him.

“What?” He asked looking at me.

“Can I kiss you?” I whispered, afraid of the rejection. I wouldn’t blame him after what he just went through with Tommy. He didn’t answer me with words however. I felt his soft lips slowly push against mine and I sighed. It felt so good to have him kissing me. We moved our lips together in a slow gentle kiss. I wrapped my arm around his waist and pulled him into my body as his arms went around my neck, one gently tugging at my hair. I didn’t want to go too fast with him so I took it slow, only lasting a short while. I slowly pulled away, smiling at him as I saw him try to follow me. 

“Silas. I really have liked you for so long. I would love it if you would be my boyfriend? I know it is a lot to ask right now, So please just take your time and think about it. Think about everything and make up your own mind. If you decide right now is not a good time, I want to be your friend at least.” I said slowly detaching from him. 

“I will think about it Declan. I have to admit that I have liked you for awhile also. I just never thought you would ever be interested in me.” He hung his head down making my heart drop. 

“I would have been blind if I had not noticed you the moment you walked into this school Silas.” I told him, making his eyes widen in surprise. “Yes I saw you the first day of your Freshman year, right when you walked into this damn school. I couldn’t and haven’t taken my eyes off you since.” He leaned up and kissed me again. I didn’t let it last long. 

“Please just go home and think about this. Make sure it is something you want. I will not hide this from anyone if we do end up dating. Just know. I really do like you and I will do my hardest to make sure no one hurts you ever again.” I kissed his cheek and walked away. I didn’t want him saying anything else right now. I would wait and let him think it over in his head. I couldn’t help but smile all the way to my car. I had to do something right after school and didn’t get home until late, the smile still on my face. Then I saw my Mother sitting at the kitchen table looking like she had been crying, my smile faded fast


	10. Silas/Declan

************ Warning: Physical abuse in this chapter ***********************

Chapter 9- Silas/Declan

It was the end of the day and I was walking very slowly home. Everything that had happened going around in my head, making me want to cry, laugh and smile all at the same time. I couldn’t believe Tommy would go that far and do what he did to me. It was worse seeing how Declan was responding, and it broke my heart knowing he was trying so hard to get to me but couldn’t. That’s when I knew he really did have feelings for me. I just couldn’t understand it. How could someone like him want to be with someone like me. 

He saved me today from being raped. I couldn’t repay him enough for that act of kindness. He lost his friend by helping me and I didn’t know how to feel about that. I dragged my feet across the pavement as his words in the library came back to me. I lifted my fingers to my lips remembering the gentle kisses we shared. Did I want a relationship with him? I knew I have liked him since freshman year, I tried not to after his friends hurt me and he didn’t help, but after everything these last couple days I wasn’t sure anymore. 

I could tell he was sincere when he told me he wanted to be with me. I just didn’t want him to have to deal with everything I deal with everyday if we do get together. I don’t even know if his parents know he is gay. I can’t hide who I am and I won’t. I really have to figure things out. I finally got to my front door and opened it, only to be grabbed and pushed into the wall. Looking up I saw my dad’s furious face staring at me. 

“Took you long enough to get home. What do you think you have been doing whoring yourself out at school? Answer me boy!” He yelled at me. 

“I...I don’t know what you are talking about Dad.” I spat out and got hit across the face hard, making my lip split and blood trickle down my chin.

“I am not your father, you are not my son. You are a little Fag throwing yourself at every boy at school.” He banged me against the wall and then dragged me into the living room and threw me on the couch. He took out his phone and clicked a couple things before showing me a video. I almost threw up right then. I watched as on the screen there I was stomach across a desk, pants down around my ankles and Tommy behind me about to rape me, it quickly changed before Declan came into the room to save me making it look like I wanted it and then it changed to Declan in the library kissing me. Of course the time stamp is the same day and only a short time apart. 

“Well have anything to say for yourself Whore?” My dad spat at me as I felt tears flowing down my face. I heard my mother moving around the kitchen, I knew she wouldn’t come in here to help me. 

“The classroom, Tommy was trying to rape me. Declan came and saved me. The library, I really like.” My head was thrown to the side after my father punched me again. 

“I don’t think that boy was trying to rape you, You slept with him on your own little bitch.” Another punch and this one harder than the last, My eyes were starting to become blurry. “And the kid in the library, that’s the Sylvester boy wasn’t it. What were you doing in his room the other night when we were there. Were you throwing yourself at him then to?” 

“No.No Dad I.” Another punch this one to my stomach making me lean over the couch almost falling off of it. It hurt to breathe, the room was starting to spin. I didn’t know what to do. I knew I had to get out of here and get somewhere else. Declan’s face came into my mind and I knew I had to get to his house. It wasn’t far. Could I make it? 

My dad grabbed me by the front of my shirt and dragged me to the front door. He opened the door and punched me in the stomach again before throwing me hard onto the ground. He kicked me in the side and spat in my face, throwing my bag onto my head, hard, I could feel the weight of the books.

“You are never to step foot in this house again. You are no longer a part of this family. Get off my lawn.” He spat and I was trying to crawl away the whole time he was kicking. I felt blood coming into my mouth and I went to spit it on the ground only to have my DAD bend down and punch me in the face.

“Do not spit your shit on my lawn.” He yelled. I finally made it to the sidewalk and heard him go back into the house. I laid there for a few minutes trying to rest and keep my eyes open. The world was spinning and hazy. I dragged myself up, holding my bag and my sides. I slowly limped the direction I knew Declan lived. I have no idea how long it took me to get there but it was dark when I did. I lifted my hand and rang the bell, falling to my knees after I did. I closed my eyes when I heard the door open and blacked out right when I heard a gasp.

“Silas!” 

*************************************************************************************************

“Mom why are you crying?” I asked, running over and putting my arm around her shoulder. My mother was a strong woman and I never really saw her cry. 

“Oh Declan. It is just as I feared.” She cried. 

“What is. What happened Mom.” I worried. 

“Silas was here.” She wiped her face with the tissue she was holding. 

“Where is he? In my room. What’s wrong.” I was worried. 

“He came here and was passed out on the front porch when I got to the door. He was beaten up. I don’t know who did it but he needs help. I’m not calling his parents because I don’t know who did this. I called an ambulance and he is at the hospital. Your father is with him, I wanted to wait for you to get home.” My heart dropped. How bad was he?

“Let’s go Mom. I need to be there with him. How bad is he?” I asked and she just sobbed more. I grabbed her hand and walked her to my car. She climbed to the passenger side and I ran to get into the drivers. It didn’t take long to get there. I sped the whole time and my mother didn’t even yell at me. It must be bad. I saw my dad sitting in the waiting room as I ran into the hospital, he quickly pulled me into a hug. 

“Where is he? I need to see him.” I told my dad and he pulled away looking in my eyes.

“He is in surgery right now Declan. They will come get us when he is out.” I felt my legs collapse under me and my dad sat me in the nearest chair. 

“Who did that to him. Who hurt him so bad he has to have surgery?” I asked my dad. 

“We won’t know until he wakes up and tells us. We informed the hospital that we think he was abused at home before so they are getting the cops here when he wakes before they inform his parents.” He told me and I felt my whole body turn to ice. If it was his parents how could they do that to him. How could anyone do that to their own child. I really hope it wasn’t any of the guys from the team because I would have to personally kill them. 

“How bad was he. What is wrong with him?” I looked at my dad when I could breathe again. 

“His face is all swollen, he had ruptured blood vessels in his face and internal bleeding in his stomach. Also a couple broken ribs and a slight skull fracture.” My father was telling me and with each thing he said I felt like I was going to be sick. I ran to the trash and threw up. I sank to the floor crying and felt my parents wrap their arms around me. 

“I told him I wouldn’t let anyone else hurt him. I told him I would protect him. I can’t protect him. I don’t deserve him.” I cried out. 

“What does he mean?” I heard my dad ask my mom. 

“Can I tell him for you Declan?” I heard my mom ask through her sniffling. I nodded yes, too weak to explain to him, hoping he still loved me. 

“I only invited those awful people to dinner because our son is in love with theirs.” She easily told him I was gay at the same time who I wanted. 

“I see.” My dad said hugging me tighter. My heart dropped for a second until he started to talk again. “Son I love you. You don’t have to worry about that. I wish you could have told me yourself but this is fine. Silas will heal and you won’t lose him.” My dad kissed the top of my head and I felt a big weight lift off my shoulder. 

“Sylvester family.” We heard and quickly stood up to see the doctor standing near us.

“How is Silas? Please tell me he is going to make it.” I pleaded looking in his eyes. 

“He is sleeping. He will probably be out for a while. He did wake up before we went into work on him and told us who did this before passing back out. We fixed what we could in surgery. everything else will have to heal on his own. I am going to contact the police so they will know they have to be here when he wakes.” The doctor told us.

“Who did this?” I snapped, my mom grabbed my hand to calm me down.

“It was his father, but I suspect that his mother may have been involved, if not tonight other times. There is evidence of past abuse.” He said

“Kids in school beat him too.” I whispered and heard my parents gasp. 

“You were not one of those kids, were you son?” I heard the disappointment in his voice.

“No. No never but i also never did anything until recently to stop it. It may as well be just as much my fault as theirs.” I cried. I hated myself so much. 

“Yes you should have helped, told someone about it. But you have been here for him now and he knows this. You have talked to him about it. This right here right now is not your fault.” My dad told me. 

“Can I go to his room? Please?” I looked at the doctor pleading with him. 

“Yes follow me.” I stood up and walked behind him, my parents behind me. We came to his room and the doctor walked away. I stood there looking at the door not being able to go in.

“We will be right behind you Dec.” My Mom said as she placed a hand on my shoulder. I nodded and slowly opened the door. It was a little dark in the room. The only light was by his bed so I couldn’t see him yet. As I got closer to his bed my legs became weak and I fell to the floor. His beautiful face was so black and blue. He didn’t even look like himself. What did his dad do? My dad helped me up and sat me in a chair next to Silas’s bed. I slowly reached my hand out, shaking, as I took his hand into mine. He felt so cold. I looked at his chest to make sure he was breathing and his chest was rising up and down very very slowly. I cried. I laid my head on the bed next to him and I couldn’t stop crying until I passed out.


	11. Declan

Chapter 10- Declan

I stayed at the hospital when my parents left. I refused to leave until I knew Silas was going to wake up and was alright and protected. My Mom told me she would bring me food and change of clothes when needed. I was glad they were not trying to make me leave his side. I stayed in the hospital for four days. My parents grabbed my school work so I could do it and brought it back for me. I wasn’t leaving for anything. The doctor and nurses would come in and give me a sad look. That pissed me off because I know he will wake up. On the Fifth day it happened. He slowly opened his eyes and groaned out in pain. 

“Silas stay still. I will get a nurse. I will be right back.” I said kissing his hand afraid to hurt him if I kissed anywhere else. I quickly ran out of the room and to the nurses station.

“He’s awake. Silas Reed is awake.” I smiled at the nurse and she nodded, grabbing the phone next to her. I ran back into the room and right to his side. 

“Where.” he started to ask but I hushed him. 

“The Doctor will be here in a minute. He will explain everything to you Silas. Please just rest.” I watched as he closed and opened his eyes making me know he understood. I gently rubbed my thumb over the back of his hand making him close his eyes again, a tear dropping out of them. I was about to wipe them away for him as the door opened and the Doctor and a nurse came in the room. The nurse walked around the bed checking the machines then his vitals. 

“Well Mr. Reed you had a terrible ordeal and are in the hospital. You arrived five days ago. We had to do emergency surgery on you but you seem to be healing up really well. Do you remember what happened?” I watched as Silas nodded slowly and closed his eyes. 

“Do you want to tell me and I will let the police know or would you rather wait for them?” The doctor asked. 

“You.” Silas rasped out. “I don’t like cops.” he proceeded to say.

“May I ask why Mr. Reed?” The doctor asked. 

“Never believe me.” He told him, making my heart clench at his words.

“Believe you about what?” The doctor went on. I knew where he was going with this. 

“My parents beat me. This was. This was the worst.” He quietly said crying. 

“Both of your parents do this to you?” The doctor asked while writing on some paper. 

“Yes. More my dad but they both do.” he slowly replied. closing his eyes in pain. I rubbed his hand and he looked at me and started to cry again.

“The police will be taking your parents into custody once I report this. Do you have a place to go from here?” The doctor asked and before Silas could reply I did.

“My parents said he is going to stay with us.” I said and Silas looked at me wide eyed. 

“Alright then. That's good. I didn’t want him going to the state. I’m glad he will be in a safe environment.” The doctor said. “I will be back in a little while to check on you. You may have to stay a couple of more days but at least we know where you will be going.” The doctor smiled before leaving the room, the nurse following behind. 

“Oh god Silas I was so scared.” I cried as I laid my head on his hand. I felt his thumb rub against my cheek and I sat up. 

“Did the nurse put pain medication into your Iv?” I asked. 

“Yes. It’s starting to work. How did I get here?” He asked, I just looked at him. 

“You somehow got to my house after, after this happened and my mom found you passed out on our porch.” I told him. 

“I don't remember anything after my dad threw me on the front lawn.” He told me and I clenched my other hand into a fist.

“Do you remember what made him do this to you? You said this was the worst.” He just nodded. 

“Can you tell me.” I asked. 

“I don't want you to get in trouble.” He told me, making me confused. 

“What do you mean. I promise I won’t do anything stupid.” I told him. 

“You will. I know you will and I don’t want you to get in trouble.” He stressed. 

“I don’t understand. Please I need to know. I promise I will be staying right here with you. I am not going anywhere so I won’t get in trouble.” I promised him. He took a couple deep breaths before speaking. 

“My dad had a video of that day. Tommy and me in the room. It cut off before you came in. Then of me and you kissing.” He told me and I felt so much anger boiling inside of me and told myself to calm down. I promised I wouldn’t do anything stupid and I wouldn’t, Yet. 

“It had to be Tommy, the fucker.” I yelled, making him flinch and gasp in pain. 

“Shit. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to make you hurt yourself. I’m not going anywhere. If I do anything to Tommy I won’t get into any trouble but it won’t be right away. I’m not leaving your side.” I kissed his hand and he smiled. 

I knew right now we were only friends, I just couldn’t help kissing his hand every so often. I was not going to push a relationship on him, not now. He had too much things to worry about. He would be staying in the spare room at our house. Once the police take his parents, we are going to wait for him to get out of the hospital to bring him to get his things. He was never going back there. He will stay with us until he graduates and then will always have a place to come back to. Even if we never end up together, I will always be there for him. It hurt to think about, but it was a possibility he wouldn’t want to be with me. 

“What are you thinking about?” He asked.

“Just glad you are alright. I was so worried. Waiting for you to wake up almost killed me.” I told him truthfully. 

“Well I’m awake now. Nothing to worry about. I’m going to sleep now.” He said eyes slowly closing. The painkillers probably finally kicking in. I was glad. I didn’t want him to force himself to stay away just because I was here. I kissed his hand and left the room to call my parents. 

“Declan what is it?” My mom asked, sounding worried. 

“He woke up and is doing good. Pain killers kicked in and he fell back to sleep so I thought I would call.” I let her know and heard her give a sigh of relief. 

“Did he say what happened?” She asked.

“Yes. It was his dad.” I said

“Oh god that poor boy.” She replied. 

“He said his mom also does this but this is the worst. It was a video someone sent of things that happened at school that day.” I told her everything that happened and I heard her crying. 

“My baby boy are you alright, is he alright. Of course he’s not but are you?” She asked me so fast I almost didn’t understand her. 

“My pain is nothing compared to what Tommy or his father did. I’m fine. Tommy is going to get payback for the video that caused Silas this pain. I don’t know when or how but it will happen mom. I just wanted to let you know.” I told her.

“I understand. You are like your father in that way. Just try not to get hurt your self and No murder.” She laughed. 

“Oh i wont murder him, i will just make him wish I did. Anyway the doctor said the cops will be taking his parents into custody before he gets our in a couple days. So we can take him to get his stuff for the spare room. I told him he is staying with us from now on.” I let her know. 

“That’s good. He belongs here where he will be safe and not judged. What about the two of you?” She asked me, I could hear worry in her voice. 

“I don’t know. I’m not going to push it with him. He deserves to be happy and decide what he wants. I will be happy to just have him in my life.” I told her. 

“Oh baby but you deserve to be happy too but i understand. Just give him time you never know.” She tried to reassure me. 

“I know. I’ll let him bring it up. He knows how I feel. I told him that day before this all happened.” I told her. 

“You might just have to let him know again. After something like this happens to someone they sometimes think no one can love or care for them. Just wait a little while for him to heal and then bring it up.” God I loved my mom. She was the smartest person I ever have known.

“thank you mom. I’m going to go back to his room. I love you. I’ll let you know when to come get us.” 

“alright sweetie. Your father and I love you. Get rest and tell Silas we are glad he is awake and can’t wait for him to come home.” I smiled when she said home. My home was going to be his home and hopefully he will feel safe and protected there. 

When I got back into Silas’s room I saw him awake and crying on the bed. I rushed over and grabbed his hand making him jump and hiss in pain.

“I’m sorry. Silas why are you crying?” I asked. 

“I thought you left me to go after Tommy. Where were you?” He asked. 

“I’m sorry. When you fell asleep I went to call my mom and tell her what was going on. She said her and my dad are glad you are awake and can’t wait till you can come home.” I smiled at him. 

“Don’t scare me like that again. I thought you were going to go kill him and get arrested and I would never see you again.” He grabbed my hand and looked at me with such worry in his eyes.  
“Silas I promised I wouldn’t do anything right now and I’m not going to. He will get what is coming to him in time but I am not leaving this hospital while you are in here.” I kissed his hand again and he rolled his eyes.

“What was that look for?” I smiled. 

“Kiss me on the lips not my hand Declan.” He flat out told me and I smiled.

“Are you sure? I didn’t want to pressure you into anything.” I asked.

“Just kiss me please.” He pleaded with me and I gently leaned onto the bed and slowly placed my lips onto his, gently kissing him, not wanting to hurt him. He opened his mouth to me letting me explore his mouth and run out tongues together. I heard him moan and I slowly pulled away. 

“Don’t want to get too excited. I don’t want to hurt you.” I smiled at him and he sighed. “Right now we focus on you getting better, after we can talk about us more if you want to.” I told him.

“Sounds like a plan.” He smiled and drifted back to sleep.


	12. Declan

****************Warning physical and sexual abuse in this chapter**************

Chapter 11- Declan

The day before Silas was able to leave the hospital the police told us that they had arrested and charged his parents for child neglect, Child abuse, and Child endangerment. They would be going to jail, we didn’t know for how long but he wouldn’t have to worry about ever going back there again. Right now we were in my parents car going to his house. My Father was driving a truck so we had a place to put all of Silas things. When we got there Silas stiffened in the back seat and I turned around to look at him.

“Your parents are not here. They are sitting in jail right now. We are going in with you and my parents will wait in the living room so we can box up your things. I will be with you the whole time Silas.” I grabbed his hand and squeezed, he relaxed and smiled at me. 

We all piled out of the car and went into the house. I followed Silas down the hall and thought we were going to go up the stairs but instead we went down to the basement. I furrowed my brows in confusion but followed him anyway. When we entered the basement it was freezing and I wrapped my arms around myself for a moment and noticed the cold didn’t bother Silas. I looked around and saw all his things littering around the room. A blow up mattress on the floor, a couple boxes with clothes hanging out of them. He has a small black and white tv sitting in the corner with a game system hooked up to it. Art supplies and violin sitting on the other side of the room. There was no lamp or lights in the room except a small window in the corner of the basement. A washer and dryer in another corner and my heart just dropped. I walked over to him and gave him a hug. 

“What was that for?” He asked. 

“Your parents made you sleep on an air mattress in a small danky cold basement. Why didn’t you say anything to anyone about this?” I asked. 

“I tried. My parents always found out when someone was coming and hid all my stuff here and showed them my old room with everything in it. After a couple tries and no one believed me about how I was treated I just stopped trying.” He hung his head. 

“Well you will have a big ass room with a big ass bed and warm blankets and lights. You play violin and paint?” I asked, pointing to the corner. 

“Yeah. Haven’t done either in a while can’t really see down here.” He replied. 

“Well now you can. If you don’t want paint to get on carpet in your bedroom we have a big shed out back no one uses. It’s empty. I’m sure my parents will allow you to use that.” He smiled brightly at me and hugged me. I pulled back and smiled at him, staring into his eyes. He quickly pressed a kiss to my lips and began packing what little he had. 

When we made two trips up with his stuff my parents looked confused. I told them where his room was and he didn’t have much. My mom all but lost her shit. We didn’t even go home first. My mom sent my dad to the house to bring whatever Silas already had to his room and she took us shopping. I groaned. I hated shopping with my mom, but then I remembered it was for Silas so I smiled and agreed. 

By the time we were done he had a whole new wardrobe, which I might ad was the best part of the shopping I might say. Seeing him try on all the clothes and wanting to do nothing but tear them off of him cause god damn he was so good looking. He bought new hair dye to be able to re-dye his hair since it was starting to fade. Some new lip and eyebrow rings, since I told my mom I didn’t see anymore in his things and he needs to change them every so often. A new tv, light, bedding. I let them finish whatever they were doing when I saw the art supply and music stores. I saw that his violin was old and splintering and the bow was curved too much so I went and bought him new ones. I also bought a bunch of new art supplies.

I had my dad come to the store and bring everything back while they were still in the mall. He hugged me and told me he was so proud of me. I didn’t do this for him to be proud, it was a bonus. I bought him the things because I cared for him and wanted him to be happy living with us. Having his hobbies there would help that. 

I met back up with my Mom and Silas and we quickly grabbed something to eat before heading back home. I told him to grab some of his new clothes and shower, that we would place everything in his room and he can set it all up later. I told him which door was his and I would be downstairs waiting for him so he had some privacy. 

I waited and heard the shower turn off. A little while later I heard him open the door and walk down the hall and open his door. I heard a loud gasp and then crying? Why was he crying? My parents looked at me and I rushed up the stairs and to his room. He was holding the violin and looking at the art supplies with tears running down his face. 

“Did you.....Did you buy all this?” He asked looking at me, tears running down his face. I didn’t know what to say. Was he happy, sad, mad? I just nodded. He put the violin down gently on his bed and ran over to me throwing his arms around me and kissing me. It took me a moment to respond. I kissed him back slowly while holding his waist. I pulled back from him just looking into his amazing grey eyes. 

“You didn’t have to do that. You and your family are already doing so much for me.” He said hanging his head down. I lifted his face to look back at me. 

“I did it because I care and You need things you like to do around you. I saw you needed new ones of it all so I did what I thought would make you happy.” I told him. He began nodding his head vigorously.

“Yes they are my favorite things to do. I just can’t believe you would spend your own money on me like that. You didn’t have to get so much or so expensive.” He looked at the violin then and I just smiled. 

“It reminded me of you. It was stunning and just thought of you playing it and watching you with it, I had to buy it.” I smirked. The blush that grew on his face was worth it. It covered the dark bruises on it and made me smile. 

“Boys we need you to come down here so we can talk.” My mom yelled up making me look at Silas and saw the worry on his face. 

“I’m sure it is nothing bad. Let’s go.” I smiled and grabbed his hand, pulling him down the stairs and into the living room where my parents were. 

“Alright some ground rules.” I rolled my eyes, great. “I know you two were discussing a relationship before this all happened. We are happy about that but don't want either of you rushing into anything. If in the future you both decide to be together let us know. However, if you are in each other's room, doors stay open. Don’t look at me like that Declan you know the rules.” My dad said as I rolled my eyes. 

“Silas, curfew is eleven on weekends and ten on school nights. There is a shed out back you can use as an art studio or music or both. It is yours to use. It has sat out there since forever never touched.” I saw him smile and thank both my parents. 

“If there are any issues with anyone, Kids, adults or whatever you tell us, the both of you. We are here to help and protect the both of you. Now Silas you can go situate your room however you like it. Declan come to the kitchen with me.” My dad said and I saw Silas look between us before he got up and went to his room. When my dad heard the door close he turned to me. 

“Please take your time with him. Don’t push him into anything.” He said looking at me.

“I know. I’m letting him make all the moves first. It’s his choice. He knows how I feel and I already told him I will always be for him even if only as a friend.” My dad smiled at that.

“Now your mother told me you want to get back at Tommy for the video. I’m telling you don’t. It will just make things worse for you.” He said. I shook my head no.

“No he hurt him. He knew what that would do if he showed his parents. He got him put in the hospital Dad. I am not going to let that go.” I practically shouted.

“Quiet before he hears you.” My dad told me.

“I’m sorry dad but I have to do something.” He just shook his head and told me to be careful before he walked away. I was so angry. How could I not do anything to Tommy. He hurt Silas worse than anyone. 

“I’m going for a walk. I'll be back soon. Let Silas know for me.” I told my mom as I walked past the living room. 

“Be careful.” She told me and I nodded. 

I slowly walked down the road from my house and turned into the woods that were at the end of the road. I loved walking out here, it was always quiet and normally there was no one else that came out here. I got about half way down the path when I heard a noise behind me making me spin around. I didn’t see anyone there and waited a moment before turning back around and walking again. A couple steps in I heard a noise again but didn’t know which way it was coming from, it sounded like from more than one direction. I spun in a circle trying to find where the noise was, I quickly pulled out my phone and was about to dial my dad when I got tackled to the ground, my phone flying out of my hand. I looked over to where it went and saw John pick it up. Shit.

I looked around me and saw Damon was the one to tackle me to the ground. I was about to get up when my arms were grabbed from behind me and I was pulled down to the ground, arms locked above me as Damon grabbed my legs and held them down. I struggled and looked at my hands seeing Tommy smirking at me. 

“what the fuck do you guys want. Let me go.” I was trying to pull free from somewhere.

“Oh no we haven’t seen you or your lover boy for a while. Heard he got himself put in the hospital. Did his parents not like the gifts I sent them?” Tommy laughed out. 

“You fucker. You are going to pay for that. Let me go and fight like a goddamn man.” I yelled, still trying to break free when I froze. I felt a hand on my stomach.”

“We know a little lover boy is living with you now. How would it feel if he never trusted you again and didn’t want anything to do with you?” Damon said running his hand over my stomach to my chest. 

“He would never believe you. He hates all of you and knows you would do anything to hurt us.” I told them. John started to laugh. 

“Not if he thinks you are doing it on your own accord.” John stated. 

“What the fuck are you talking about. He knows I would never do anything willingly with any of you.” I yelled. 

“Well here's the thing. If you don’t make out with Damon here, because I know he would never believe you would do that with me. We will hurt him worse than his parents did. If you tell him about this he won’t ever leave the hospital.” Tommy said, making me freeze. “I see you are going to agree'' He smiled.

“If not I have incentive.” John said holding my phone and pulling out a gun from his back pocket. Where the fuck did he get that. I closed my eyes and nodded my head. 

“Good. Now lets go where we won't be found. Waterfall, think that will be a great place. You are going to act all happy in the video and act like you hate Silas. We will be behind you out of camera view, Damon will record it all and you will act happy and wanting. If you don’t I will use this without hesitation.” John said. I nodded and they roughly grabbed me to my feet and I followed them to the waterfall. 

When we got there Damon and I went into the small cave behind the waterfall and Tommy and John stood behind up off to the side, gun pointing right at me. I was scared and angry. I didn’t want to do this, but I had to keep Silas safe.

“Happy remember. Turning on the camera now.” Damon said and turned it to me. I placed a shy smile on my face trying to make it look real. 

“God Declan I haven’t seen you in days. I missed you. I thought I would record us so if I go days without you again I will be able to watch, is that alright babe?” Damon asked, smiling at me. 

“Oh course. I’m sorry I haven’t been around much. Things to deal with my parents are making me do. You understand. Right?” I smiled at him. He placed the camera down on a small lip on the rocks so it would see wherever we were. He walked over and pulled me to him, smiling. 

“Of course. I know your mom worried about that little prick so you had to play along. As long as You always come back to me.” Damon then kissed me and I tried not to throw up. I grabbed his waist as he pushed his tongue into my mouth and kissed me hard. I was thinking about Silas the whole time and felt my cock twitch. NO please no. 

“Oh looks like my favorite friend is ready to play.” He laughed and took off my shirt and his. He kissed down my chest and slowly pulled me down to sit on his lap, my arms wrapped around his neck while his arm was around my waist. He was grinding up into me and holding my waist so I would grind down into him. My breath quickened and I rested my head on his shoulder. He lifted my head up to his face and started to kiss me again. Silas came into my mind as we kissed and ground into each other and it didn’t take long for me to explode right behind Damon.

“God I missed being able to be with you. You have to get away from the little bitch as much as you can so we can have our fun. I don’t understand why you can’t just be with me.” Damon said and he had this hurt look in his eyes. He quickly turned the camera off and the moment I saw that I leaned over and threw up. I felt a hand on my back trying to comfort me and I threw it off. 

Damon looked like he wanted to die. He looked so sad and upset. He was trying not to look behind him at the other two. That's when I slowly glanced behind him and saw that John had the gun moving between myself and Damon. I sat up and pulled Damon into a hug, he gasped but threw his arms around me. I whispered in his ear so the other two couldn’t hear me. 

“Did they force you to do this too?” I asked and felt him nod into my shoulder, I felt sick again. “I’m so sorry Declan.” He whispered back. 

I heard movement and looked up. I watched as Tommy took the phone away from Damon as he was trying to hold onto it for dear life. 

“Let it go Damon.” Tommy spat out, and he did. We just sat there behind the waterfall as John and Tommy moved behind us. 

“Tell anyone of this and you know what will happen.” Tommy said and grabbed John to walk away. That was the moment both Damon and I broke. I grabbed a hold of him and cried just as hard as he was. I pulled back and looked at him. 

“Why did you do it, What did they threaten you with?” I asked him. 

“Your life.” He said. I was confused. 

“What why?” I asked. 

“Everything. Everything we ever did to Silas or you, they made me do it. That gun has been hanging over my head for years. I just never thought they would take it this far.” He gasped out in between tears.

“Why? I still don't understand.” 

“They found out in freshman year I am Gay. I saw you staring at Silas when he started school with us and figured out you must be too. I fell for you over the years and they knew it. They taunted me about your feelings for Silas and threatened your life if I didn’t help beat him. Then you gave up on the bet and you became fair game when you came out. Tommy lied when he said he liked you, he was talking about me. He just wanted to hurt you and me. I’m so sorry. I knew I never had a chance like that. I just wanted to be friends and close to you. I’m so sorry about everything that has happened to Silas and you. I don't know how to get out of all this alive.” He said and I handed him his shirt and grabbed mine. I didn’t know what to say. I was screwed either way. I had to figure some way out for all of us. 

“Go home, shower. I forgive you alright. I will try to talk to you soon. I need to get home. Everything is going to be ruined and I don’t know what to do.” I said and we both left that waterfall.


	13. Declan

Chapter 12- Declan

By the time I got home it was now dark out. I walked into the house and my mom rushed over to me, turning me around to make sure I was alright, then pulled me into a hug.

“We were so worried about you sweetie. Where have you been?” She asked. 

“I went out for a walk and lost track of time. Sorry Mom. I’m going to go see Silas.” I said.

“He’s sleeping. He was really tired so I told him to go to bed and he would see you in the morning. He was worried also.” She sadly looked at me. 

“I’m sorry mom. I really really am sorry.” I was trying not to cry thinking about Damon and everything. My heart hurt and I knew I was going to lose Silas at any moment. I just didn’t know when Tommy was going to send that video. I walked up the stairs and was about to go into my room but quickly moved to Silas’s door. I cracked it open and saw him soundly sleeping. I moved into the room and looked at his peaceful face and leaned down to place a small kiss to his lips. Worried it would be my last. I held my breath trying not to sob at that thought and quickly left and closed his door. 

I ran to my room and threw myself onto my bed and covered my face with a pillow. I screamed into it, trying to get all my anger and frustration out with that one scream. It didn’t help. I knew it could have been worse. John had a gun and could have had us do anything. What happens if they think of just that, what happens if they keep making me and Damon do things. I ran to my trash can and threw up. I couldn’t move from that spot and just fell asleep on the floor. 

The next morning I woke up to someone scream. I quickly jumped off my floor and saw my parents at their bedroom door. 

“I’ll check on him.” I said and they nodded going back into their room. I placed my ear to the door and heard voices in the room and my heart sank. I opened his door and he turned to me with anger and tears in his eyes. He turned his phone to me and I saw the video of me and Damon. I felt like I was going to get sick again. 

“It’s not what it.” I began and he threw his phone at me, hitting me in the head. I grabbed the spot it hit and cried out, looking at him but he didn’t look sorry he looked pissed. 

“get the fuck out of my room.” He screamed at me and I heard my parents door open but didn’t care. I walked closer to him and he threw his pillow at me, at least that was softer. 

“Please let me explain.” I pleaded but he just kept throwing things at me. 

“You are such a liar. I trusted you. I trusted you. Get out, leave me alone. Ignore me, don’t talk to me,Get out.” He screamed and I backed up and ran into my room. I slammed my door shut, locking it and sliding down to sit on the floor. I couldn’t stop crying. I didn’t know what to do. He hated me. Everything I have done has been for him and he hates me. 

A short time later my mom was knocking on my door. I let her in and she looked disappointed in me. My heart broke more. 

“Mom let me explain. I need to talk.” She cut me off. 

“No you are not to talk to him. You have hurt him so badly. I thought you loved him Declan. I thought you were the one to protect and love him but you just hurt that poor poor boy, probably worse than his father did. You're grounded, and stay away from Silas. I will bring you your food until he has calmed down.” She shut my door and I dropped to the floor. They wouldn’t even let me talk, wouldn’t let me tell them. I know it was a risk to tell them because of John and the gun but I needed them to know, I loved Silas. 

It’s been three days and my mom is still bringing me food. I go to school, avoid everyone then come home and stay in my room. I have been able to avoid Tommy and John. Damon hasn’t been to school since, I don’t know what's up with that or where he is. I tried calling him but he won’t answer his phone. His parents said he is fine just not feeling all that great. I wish I could stay home but my mom is making me go to school and leave before Silas so they give him a ride and pick him up. 

When I accidently bump into him in the hall he runs past me, not letting me touch him or talk to him. I can’t keep doing this. My parents are mad at me, Silas hates me. No one at school is talking to me. I am so alone. I have thrown everything away that my mom has brought me to eat, I haven’t eaten at school this whole time either. I just can’t eat. My stomach rejects it and I throw up everything. My chest hurts so much from my heart being broken and crying all the time. 

After another three days my energy is so low I almost can’t even get out of bed. I drag my feet to get dressed and go down to my car. I park in the school parking lot and feel like I am about dead. I pull out my phone, click on streaming video and add some names into it, then I hit stream.

“I don’t really know where to start this. This last week has been the worst in my whole life. I have lost my friends, family and most importantly the boy I love, Silas. Everything I did that day was for him. Both Damon and I were threatened with different things to do the shit we did. Damon I’m sorry but in order for me to tell my story I have to tell yours.” I took a breath, looking away from the camera to wipe the tears from my eyes. 

“Tommy and John have been threatening Damon with a gun for years to help them beat up and torture Silas because they knew how I felt about him. They threatened to Kill me if he didn’t help because of how he felt about me. God Again Damon I am so sorry. I wish I knew I would have helped.” I turned away again. I felt like throwing up. I could barely breathe, and I was so tired, but I needed to do this.

“Than Tommy sent a recording to My love’s parents ending him up in the hospital. It was at the time the worst thing that has happened to me. I was so worried for him. Then he moved in with us and I was the happiest I have ever been, even if we never got together he was still in my life. God I love you Silas. Then it all got fucked up. I lost everything. Everything Thanks to Tommy and John.” I stopped for a minute. It hurts so bad. My stomach, my chest. I couldn’t breath. I started to hyperventilate. I had to stop , I had to finish this. 

“I went for a walk. I was so happy and needed to blow off energy so I didn’t scare Silas with how I was feeling. How I just wanted to crab him and never stop kissing him. I was jumped by Tommy, John and at the time I thought Damon was doing this on his own free will. They threatened me with the gun, told me if I didn’t do as they said they would really hurt Silas. If I told anyone they would kill him. I feel like I’m not going to be here that long so here's this video.” I coughed, held my chest and slowly continued. 

“We went to the waterfall where they recorded me and Damon. I saw how they were holding the gun on both of us and asked Damon about it and he told me. SO sorry again Damon. All I thought of the whole time was Silas. His face in my head during it all. I couldn’t stop thinking about him. Now I lost him. I lost everything. I’m so sorry everyone. I can’t. I’m so weak.” I dropped my phone somewhere in my car, I tried to find it but I was so weak I couldn’t move. No food, throwing up, crying, and barely sleeping finally caught up to me. No one cared anyway. No one was talking to me. I would die here in my car and never have anything to worry about anymore. I found the strength to whisper one more thing before everything went black. 

“Good bye Silas, I love you.” 

***************************************************

This chapter is short because I think that is where I should end it. 

I hope everyone likes reading this so far. The story is finished, I am just editing the final chapters so I can post them. Enjoy and vote. Thank you.


	14. Silas

Chapter 13- Silas

The first three days after seeing that video of Declan and Damon was the hardest. I saw Declan everywhere. Bumped into him in the hall at the house every day. I would just run past him and down the stairs to safety. I stayed with Taylor at school and she would tell me if he was anywhere in sight and we would go the other way. We ate outside at lunch and I got a ride to and from school by his parents. The next three days were easier. He left before anyone else was up and stayed in his room after school. He kept his head down at school and didn’t even notice me at all. He looked sick and I was worried about him but he hurt me so bad.

He told me he loved me and would protect me. Then he goes off and is with Damon. From the video it looked like that was not the first time or last and he said awful things about me they both did. Did he ever care about me? He seemed to when he worried about me in the hospital. When he got me to live with him. When he would kiss me. Was it all a lie? I woke up this morning still feeling upset but not as much. Maybe I will talk to him and see what he has to say. Maybe he loves Damon also and didn’t know what to do. My phone beeped letting me know I had a notification. I turned my phone on and saw it was a streaming video from Declan. I furrowed my brow and clicked open. It was him in his car. He looked really sick. Tired. Then he started to talk. 

I was getting scared with every word he was saying. He kept stopping and wiping his eyes. Then stopping because it looked like he was having a hard time talking, breathing. My heart was racing, I was freaking out. Then he stopped for a minute, dropping his phone. I was about to run out of the room when I heard him whisper. 

“Goodbye Silas, I love you.” I started crying hysterically. That's when his parents ran into the room and grabbed me. 

“We have to go find him. He is in his car. Might be at the school. Let’s go. Oh my baby boy.” She was screaming as we ran out of the house and into the car. She got on the phone and called the police, sending them a copy of the video and needing an ambulance to meet at the school parking lot. 

“What have I done. What have I done?” I was repeating over and over again. “It's all my fault. I should have listened to him. I should have paid more attention like he did with me. What have I done?” I couldn’t stop crying. 

“Hush Silas. It’s all our faults. None of us would listen to him. He tried over and over and we didn’t want to listen. We thought he really fucked up. But it was all of us.” His mom cried as his father concentrated on the road. We finally pulled into the school parking lot. Ambulance right behind us. We found his car and stopped abruptly behind it. I ran out, almost falling and scrambled to his door. I yanked it open and found him barely breathing, slumped between the seats. 

“Oh god Declan.” I pulled him up and into my chest kissing his head. “Please be alright. Please. I love you.” I screamed as the ambulance men pulled me away from him and pulled him out and onto a stretcher. I watched crying as they put him in the ambulance. 

“Go with him Silas.” She said pushing to the door and helping me climb in. I moved to his side and held his hand as they worked on him. When we got to the hospital they made me wait for his parents and sat me in a seat where I sat crying until they showed up. 

I was going to lose him. What have I done? Why didn’t I listen? I ran to the trash can and threw up just as his mom and dad showed up. She ran to me and rubbed my back trying to make me feel better. 

We waited hours for the doctor when he finally came out. Concern on his face. This wasn’t good. 

“Well he was very dehydrated and malnourished. He was sleep deprived and his pulse is very low right now. He is on an iv and we have a feeding tube in him trying to get him all the nutrients he needs. We have to wait and see what happens. Some of his vital organs began to shut down which is what made him finally pass out. Watching that video I am surprised he was able to do it that long.” We all were crying by the time he stopped talking. 

“When can we see him?” His mother asked what I was thinking.

“You can go in his room now. He is awake but very weak.” He said and we followed him down the hall and to his room. I didn’t want to go in. I couldn’t see him like that. I remembered him being in my room for days while I was out so I forced myself to walk into the room after his parents and couldn’t stop crying. He looked so frail and weak. I had never seen him look anything like that. always healthy and strong.

I moved to the side of his bed and he turned his head away from me. Refusing to look at me. He looked at his mother and started to try to talk. She moved closer, he talked so low but I heard him.

“Tell him to leave.” He said and I broke. I started to sob. “Now” He wheezed out. I stood up so fast that my chair fell over onto the floor. I could see he was fighting looking over to me. I covered my mouth with my hand and ran out of the room. I heard someone following behind me and fell to the floor outside his door. 

“Oh sweetie. I just think he doesn’t want you to see him like that.” His mom said bringing me into a hug. 

“He hates me. I didn’t listen to him and he ended up like this because of me, He hates me.” I cried into her arms. 

“No he doesn’t. You saw that video. He loves you so much Silas. Just give him time he will be asking for you.” She reassured me. 

“Fine. I will give him time. Can you take me home please.” She nodded her head and we left the hospital. She dropped me off and I ran into the backyard and into the shed. I needed to paint. I needed to keep my mind on something. 

I painted for hours and realized it was all revolving around Declan. His face, us together, us kissing, in the library, just sitting on my bed. him in the hospital bed with me sitting next to him. I couldn’t stop painting him. I missed him so much. I ignored him for a week and now he was going to ignore me. My stomach started to growl so I made my way into the house to get something to eat just as his parents came in the front door. 

They were smiling and laughing and then saw me. His mom came over and hugged me, along with his father. It was like they knew something and did not want to say anything to me. I looked between them as they looked at each other. I slowly turned away from them and continued to find something to eat. If they had something to hide from me that is fine. I made a sandwich and made my way to my room. 

Declan was in the hospital for a week, never once asked for me to come with his parents or alone. He didn’t want to see me. He was coming home today and I was in the living room waiting. I heard the car door close outside and stood up going to the front door. When it opened his dad came in first and closed it behind him. I looked from him to the door with a worried look.

“Silas.” He breathed out. The tears started to come down my face and I slowly backed away from him. 

“He doesn’t want to see me?” I asked. He ran his hands into his hair and looked at me with such a sorrowful look on his face. 

“I’m sorry Silas.” I moved a little more back trying to calm down.

“Alright. I.. I’ll go to my room.” I ran so fast up the stairs I knew I missed some steps. I slammed my door behind me and sat on my bed. I heard him and his mom come into the house and his mom helped him up the stairs. They were talking in low tones and I wish I could just hear his voice. His door shut and I made my way down to the kitchen. His parents were talking but stopped when I entered the room. 

“Hello Silas dear.” His mom said. I nodded at her and went to the fridge to grab a soda. 

“Why doesn’t he want to see me.” I stood facing the fridge with the can in my hands, Squeezing it between them. I didn’t want to look at them, I didn't want to see the weird looks they are probably exchanging at this moment.

“We don’t know the answer to that sweetie.” His mom replied. I knew she was lying. I could hear it in her voice and when I turned around I could see it on their faces. 

“alright.” I said nodding. I left the house and went to the shed. I decided to stay out there as long as I could. The only time I would go into the house was if I was hungry or thirsty, or needed to go to the bathroom. I slept in there on blankets I brought from my room, It was actually better than the air mattress I used to sleep on when I lived with my parents. I would go out the side yard gate in the morning and come back in the same way after school. I walked now. I couldn’t be in the car with them while they were lying to me about their son. 

I would sit in the window of the shed and look up to his bedroom window when the light was on. Wishing for him to go to the window and look out at me. Finally realizing what he is doing to me. My heart broke a little more each day. I know I ignored him for a week, but I think he would do the same if it was me. I was called into the house after two weeks of this. I put my paint brush down and went into the house and sat on the chair in the living room. Farthest from the boy sitting on the couch who still refused to look at me. This is the first time I have seen him since laying in the hospital bed. He hadn’t been to school since and I haven’t seen him whenever I went into the house. 

I tipped my head in his direction to see how he looked since the hospital and he looked so much better, more like himself. I wanted to cry wondering if he looked better, why can’t I see him, why doesn’t he want me around. His mother cleared her throat and began to talk. 

“First, the police have arrested Tommy and John for what they have done. Damon testified right after you did Declan.” My head snapped up at this. Testified. They went to court without me. I was about to say something when his mom looked at me. I snapped my mouth shut. 

“Silas, Dear Silas.” My heart began to ache with the way she was saying my name. 

“Your Aunt called us the other day and we have discussed this together that we think it would be best for you to go live with her in Italy.” His mom said to me. I snapped my head over to Declan and he was looking only at his mother. He was refusing to even look at me. 

“No. She is just as bad as my parents. I won’t go. Please don’t make me go.” I cried. I hated her. “Why didn’t you talk to me first about this. You three talked about it without me. You went to court without me. That involved me too.” I stood up, I balled my hands into fists and turned to Declan. 

“Say something to me. I love you don’t you love me. I’m sorry I ignored you for that week. I was about to talk to you that day but you were already gone. Then I got that video and I nearly died from that. Declan please.” I said falling on the floor in front of him wanting him to just look at me. I wanted to see his green eyes looking into mine. I tried to touch his face but he flinched away from me. 

“You don’ t love me anymore do you?” I cried, going to stand up. I turned to his parents pleading with my eyes. “Please. We graduate in seven months. Can I please just stay here. I’ll stay in my room, in the shed like I have been. I’ll go to school and make my own food like I have been. I will stay away from Declan. I promise. Just please let me stay. That woman is just as bad if not worse than my father. Please, I'm begging please.” 

They looked over at each other and nodded their heads. Then they looked between myself and Declan, I turned to look at him but he was looking at the floor now, shaking his head no. My heart shattered then. I choked back a sob. 

“Alright Silas. You are welcome to stay until graduation. We don’t want you to go into a situation like you were at your parents. Now please go up to your room and sleep, not the shed.” His dad said to me and I nodded, I hung my head down and went to the stairs. I stayed on one of the lower ones out of sight. I wanted, needed to hear his voice. 

“Declan are you alright with this?” His mom asked. 

“I have no choice do I.” He spat out. I held my hand to my mouth. He sounded so much better but filled with so much hate towards me. 

“I know this will hurt him but you need to tell him what is going on Declan. You moved on, you need to stop letting him think he has a chance and let him move on as well.” His mom said and I almost screamed what she meant by that? 

“I know mom. I know it will hurt him and he needs to find someone who will love him. That’s why when his aunt called I thought that would give him a chance, if he was far away. Now I have to tell him.” I heard Declan reply. 

“I hope you are happy with him and are not making a big mistake. I see how much Silas loves you but I don’t know about.” His dad started to say but Declan stopped him.

“He loves me dad. I know he does. I love him too. We connected through this. Better than we have in the last several years and I’m not leaving him.” Declan replied. I turned and ran to my room then as quietly as I could with my breathing almost stopping. I began to cry the hardest I have ever cried. 

He’s with someone else. Since the hospital. Who is he with? Who? I don’t understand. He said he loved me would be there always even as a friend and he has shut me out. Shut me away from him. I lost him in every way. I was crying so hard that I almost didn’t hear the knock on my door.


	15. Silas

Chapter 14- Silas

I didn’t even bother wiping the tears from my face as I got up from my bed to answer my door. I knew who was on the other side and I knew what he was going to tell me. Why wipe the tears when more were sure to follow. I held my breath when I opened the door and saw him there. He looked right at me for the first time in weeks. Those green eyes looking at me just made me burst out crying again. He didn’t even get to say a word and I broke down.  
“Don’t” I trembled out when I saw him open his mouth. He closed it and just looked at me. “I heard you down stairs. I know.” I choked back the sob wanting to escape. 

“I know you don’t love me anymore.” The tears fell harder. “Just who, who do you love now?” I asked. I didn’t really want to know but I had to. I saw him flinch. His mouth opened and closed a couple of times but he didn’t say anything. My hand rested over my heart as my breathing started to quicken. I needed him gone before I passed out. 

“Alright. That’s fine. you won’t have to deal with me after graduation. I’m sorry.” The room started to spin. I had to be quick. “ you have to deal with me until then.” Then I shut my door and passed out. 

When I woke up it was dark out. I looked at my clock to see it was six in the morning. I was passed out on my floor all night long. My head hurt from crying so much and my chest hurt from breathing heavily for so long. I quickly ran around my room and got ready for school. As soon as I was dressed and had everything I needed I ran down the stairs, I saw Declan sitting in the kitchen and it looked like he was about to say something to me but I ran right out the front door. 

As I was walking to school a car came up beside me and slowed down. I looked and realized it was Declan. He rolled the passenger side window down and leaned over. 

“Get in.” He practically demanded.

“No. I’m walking.” I told him as I continued on my way, trying to watch where I was going. He pulled over to the side and got out of the car. Running up in front of me. I stopped and once I saw his eyes I looked away. I tried to walk around him but he continued to block my way. 

“Just leave me alone alright. This is what you wanted wasn’t it.” I practically screamed at him. 

“I needed you to listen to me once before and you didn’t, now you need to listen to me this time.” He said, making me stop. Throwing that in my face hurt. 

“What. You haven’t broke me enough in the last couple weeks you decide you want to do more?” I screamed, making him back up a little. “I wish you never started talking to me. I wish I never fell in love with you again. I wish I could go back to the start of the year when the only problems I had were my parents ignoring me.” I cried. The tears falling so fast I couldn’t see. I felt arms begin to wrap around me and I shoved him hard and he landed on his ass on the ground. 

“Stop. Stop playing mind games with me. It’s bad enough I’m living with you and trying so hard to be invisible in your house, your house, not mine, I will never have my house again. I felt safe and protected when I first got there. I was in love, I was so happy. then it all fell to shit. Go to your boyfriend and leave me alone.” He looked up at me from the ground and didn’t say a single word. I moved around him and quickly walked the rest of the way to school. 

I ran through the halls and found Taylor telling her everything. I couldn’t figure out who he was dating since today was the first day he would be in school since the hospital. I tried not to pay attention while I was moving class to class knowing I had a couple with Declan. I got to class first and sat in the far back with my head down and was the last to leave. At lunch we ate outside as usual and then it happened. Right when I was about to leave to go home I saw them together. Smiling and laughing like they always did. I didn’t think anything of it at first that was normal, until Declan leaned over and kissed him, bringing the other boy's body closer to his and drawing him in like he did to me in the library. 

I stood frozen to the spot. I couldn’t move, could barely breathe. My bag dropped off my arm when my hand let go of the strap. It banged so loud on the floor the two of them pulled apart to look around. Declan’s eyes met mine and I sobbed. He started to walk over to me and that sent me into action. I bent down and grabbed my bag and quickly turned around and sprinted to the other side of the school. 

Damon. He was dating Damon. If it was true he was forced to do everything he ever did to me and was forced to do that video. Did doing that with Damon in for the video make him realize he loved him back. Was this Tommy’s plan all along. The way to pull Declan away from me. I quickly made my way home and locked myself in my shed. I needed to paint. I needed to stop thinking about Declan. 

I avoided Declan and Damon for the next day before Christmas Break. When break was finally here I decided that I was going to try and stay out of the house for as long as I could. I hated being in here and I just wanted to be able to breath without worrying about trying to avoid everyone. I felt so out of place here. When I once felt I had a new place it was ripped from under my feet, throwing me into the wind with nothing to secure me. 

I was sitting in the park under a tree drawing. I usually would paint but when I go out I just bring a notebook with me and draw out what I would paint later. The paintings come out better than my drawings but at least when I have an idea I don’t have to wait to do it. I was deep in my drawing when a ball rolled and hit me in the foot. I looked up and froze. There was a boy with light blue hair walking over to me, about my age, but behind him were Declan and Damon. They stopped smiling when they saw me sitting there. The boy was now in front of me and smiling. My breath caught in my throat. 

“Hey there cutie!” The boy in front of me spoke and I felt a blush run up my face. No, I can’t think like this too soon. 

“Um, Hello.” I replied looking down at my drawing. The boy grabbed the ball and kneeled down in front of me. I looked up and then past him and saw Declan looking pissed with Damon trying to calm him down. 

“My name is Logan.” He smiled and stuck his hand out to me. I looked from his hand to his eyes and gasped. His eyes were the same color as mine. I had never seen anyone else with grey eyes before. I slowly grabbed his hand and shook it.

“Silas.” I replied and he smiled. I looked over his face and saw each ear had four piercings, there were two in his right eyebrow, one in his nose and he had snake bites just like me. He was good looking for sure, I also noticed a small part of a tattoo sticking out from under his shirt on his collar bone. 

“Would you like to join us?” He asked motioning behind him. I froze and my smile fell from my face. 

“Are you new here?” I blurted out, he had to be if he didn’t know about the history of us three.

“Yeah actually. I just transferred last week. Yeah right before break but can’t win them all I guess.” He laughed. “Why?” 

I looked behind him and he turned around and saw the other two glaring at us. Declan looked like he wanted to kill something and Damon looked upset about his behavior. 

“What’s up with them?” Logan asked looking back at me.

“Too long of a story.” I replied. 

“Did you date either of them.?” He watched my expression turn even more upset. 

“No. I didn’t.” I started to gather my things in my bag so I could leave. If they were going to be here I didn’t want to be. I stood up and started to turn around when I felt a gentle hand on my wrist. 

“Hey. So I take it you don’t want to hang with them. What about just me?” He looked into my eyes as he asked this. 

“I. I guess.” I honestly replied. I had never had someone that didn’t know me want to talk to me. 

“Alright. wait right here. I will be right back.” He said.

“Wait. Right now. I don't think that is a good idea. They will get mad.” I replied.

“Don’t worry about it. I hang out with them everyday. I need a break.” He laughed and that shocked me. I stood still where I was as I watched him jog back over to them and start to talk. I could see Declan getting more and more angry with every word that Logan was saying. Damon put his arm around him and pulled him to him, whispering in his ear and Declan shook his head no and kissed him. My heart fell to my stomach and I looked away. I didn’t even hear Logan come back until he touched my wrist again.

“Are you alright?” He asked. I wiped the tear I felt falling from my eyes and looked at him.

“Yeah. I will be. Are you sure you want to hang out with me?” I asked him, still not believing it. 

“Of course. You're the first person besides me I have seen with my eye color. Plus the rest of you isn’t half bad.” I laughed at him.

“Same about the eyes. I’m only looking to be friends however.” I told him I wanted him to know that part of me wasn’t available. 

“I see that you are hurting over someone and I am guessing it is one of those two. You can tell me whenever you want me to know what is going on but I would love to be friends with you.” He said.

“Alright. I have to bring my notebook home so I guess we can go there first.” I said and he smiled and started to walk beside me. I glanced back at the others and they were just watching us walk away. 

We finally reached my house and Logan stopped short before we made it to the side fence. I turned around and looked at him for a moment wondering why he stopped. He was looking between the house and me with a confused look on his face.

“Logan?” I questioned, snapping him out of his trance.

“You live with Declan?” He asked and I just looked at him. 

“Ah. Yeah. Have you been here before?” I asked. 

“Yeah We have all hung out in his room. I have never seen you here before. Is he your brother? Did you like Damon?” he asked. “Is that why you are upset seeing them together?” He didn’t look happy.

“What. No on all fronts.” I almost yelled making him jump. 

“Alright, Alright. If you are not his brother then are you related in a different way?” He asked. 

“No. It’s part of that long story I told you about.” I was trying to hold myself together but it was getting harder and harder. 

“Now I really want to know. But I won’t pressure you.” I looked up at him and I knew he was sincere about it. 

“Come I will talk in my shed.” I told him. I guess I would rather tell him than have him hear it from the guys. He looked at me weird but followed me to the back yard and into the shed. He was impressed by everything and sat in the chair. I paced the floor for a moment before I turned around and told him the whole story starting from freshman year until today. I cried most of the time. I couldn’t help it. It all hurt so much. I didn’t know what to do. I was still so confused with everything. It happened so fast without warning. I was sitting on the floor by the end of it and he quickly sat with me bringing me into a hug when he figured out I was finished. 

“Shit. I am so sorry. I had no idea that Declan could be so cold hearted. I would never have done that to you. You both went through alot but there is no reason he should have led you to think he still loved you. He should have talked to you before getting with Damon.”

“Thank you. I know I hurt him too but I never stopped loving him.. I still do.” I told him and he hugged me tighter.

“It’s ok. I would be amazed if you didn’t still love him. It just happened like five seconds ago.” Just then the door to my shed was thrown open and Declan was standing there. 

“Get the hell off of him.” He yelled at Logan, who slightly moved away from me but still held me. He looked up at Declan looking pissed.

“No. He needed a hug so I was giving him one. Go away Declan.” Logan spat out.

“What now you are getting my friends against me Silas. Sneaky real sneaky.” Declan sneered at me making my body start to shake from the tears. Of course he would hate me more for telling Logan. Just drive the stake through my heart even more. 

“Leave Declan. He doesn’t need your shit right now.” Logan said. 

“This is my house you leave Logan.” Declan snapped at him.

“I’m invited here by Silas. And as far as I know this is his home also. Just leave him alone.” Logan pulled me closer to him as if to shield me from Declan.

“Fine but we will talk alter Silas.” I whimpered at his tone. I was screwed. Declan left and Logan and I talked for a few more hours. He was sweet and kind and made me feel safe after the Declan thing. I was still being careful however. I didn’t want to be broken more than I already was.


	16. Declan

Chapter 15- Declan

The sun was setting while I was sitting on my bed looking out my window, watching the shed. I had just left from yelling at Silas and that ass that was supposed to be my friend Logan. I was thinking about what has happened since I left the hospital. The day Silas came in to see me I couldn't look at him. I couldn’t have him see me like that. It hurt too much. He made me that way. Not listening to me, not understanding what was going on. Ignoring me for a week. Now that I was sick he wanted to cry over me, I couldn’t stand it. 

While I was laying there healing Damon came to visit me. He had told me he had been staying home since the incident. He said he couldn’t look at me knowing we were forced to make out like that and that he let it get so far. He told me he felt ashamed because he had enjoyed it and he shouldn’t have. He couldn’t stop thinking about me and didn’t want to be anywhere around me because of the guilt. 

I told him I understood. I told him I was thinking of Silas the whole time and felt ashamed about it. That it felt great and the moment before it ended his face shot through the images of Silas which is why I threw up. I felt so ashamed that I could do that to Silas. Feel something for someone else when i shouldn’t have. Let myself think of someone else. 

Damon came by the hospital everyday after that. We got through the pain of the situation together. I still thought of Silas a little bit but Damon was getting more and more of my thoughts. One day when he was sitting beside me he leaned over and kissed me, surprising me but I kissed him back. I wrapped an arm around his neck and pulled him closer to the bed so I could have a better angle to his lips. It shot a shock through me. For a moment Silas' face flashed but I pushed it to the back of my mind and just enjoyed the moment with Damon. He slowly pulled away from me with a worried look on his face. 

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.” He said sitting back in his seat. I reached out and grabbed his hand. 

“It’s alright. I liked it.” He smiled at me and me at him. 

We ended up falling in love easily enough. Being friends for so many years and knowing so much about each other. I already forgave him for everything knowing the situation he was in. It felt right, it felt like I was finally being pulled out of my darkness. Then it was time to go home, where Silas was. I suddenly felt ashamed. I knew I couldn't see him for fear of hurting Damon. So my parents made sure he wasn’t around me when I went home. They made sure I knew whenever he was out of his room still in the house. When he left for school and when he was back. Then his aunt called and I thought my problem would be solved. that he would be far away from me and I wouldn’t have to worry about old feelings coming back to damage my new relationship. 

He refused to go and my parents agreed to have him stay. I couldn’t even look at him when he was yelling at me. Telling me he loved me, making that part of my heart open up again and rage against these feelings for Damon. I had to tell him to move on, I tried but he yelled at me saying he heard my parents and I. I couldn’t even tell him who I was without shame. Knowing Damon was the one that broke his trust in me when he saw the video.

I was ashamed and hurt and so confused. My stomach started to hurt again so I went to Damon. He helped for a little while. Then Silas saw us together in school and the look on his face hurt me more than I thought it would. I tried to go after him but Damon stopped me, told me he would be alright. I thought he would be. That day we met Logan he just arrived as a transfer, lucky shit only had one day of school before break. 

The three of us hung out everyday in my room. I knew Silas was going out everyday and wouldn’t see us. Then one day they wanted to go play soccer in the park so we went. i had no idea Silas was there. I kicked the ball a little hard and Logan went to get it. When I looked over he was talking to someone and I noticed it was Silas. Jealous rage shot through me seeing him smiling at someone else. Logan came over and started to say something.

“ Hey guys. I just met this kid over there i want to get to know better so I’m going to go hang out with him for a little while.” Logan said smiling. 

“No you're not.” I spat out not realizing I said it until it was too late. 

“Why the hell not? I can hang with whoever I want to Declan.” Logan glared at me. Damon grabbed my arm and whispered into my ear.

“He doesn’t know anything about Silas. Are you Jealous? Do you still love him?” I shook my head no in response but my heart broke by my lies. He pulled me to him and kissed me. I heard Logan walking away and looked over to them. I saw Silas was crying a little bit and my heart broke. I wanted to go over and comfort him. Fuck my life. 

Damon and I walked around for a couple of hours after that talking. I tried to reassure him that I loved him and not Silas. That everything with Silas was over before it began. He didn’t believe me. He told me to go talk to Silas that we were over. He didn’t want to be second, that he understood that I have always loved Silas. I had to talk to Silas, see where he stood with me. I needed to figure my shit out. I decided I would talk to him when I got home. 

When I did finally get home I went to Silas room but he wasn’t there. I looked out my window and saw the two of them in there hugging. I was enraged. I flew outside and tore that door open and yelled at Logan. I heard Silas whimper and move closer to him. I was really pissed. He was mine. Logan couldn’t have him. I turned around and stormed into the house and this is where I sat. Staring at them in the damn shed. Finally after what seemed like forever I heard the back door open and footsteps coming up the stairs. I threw my door open making Silas jump. 

“Leave me alone.” He whispered but I followed him until he was in his room. I closed the door and grabbed him. Spinning us around until he was against his door and I kissed him. I kissed him with everything I had. All the bottled up emotions from the last several weeks came pouring out into that one kiss. I felt him kissing me back and I love it. I couldn’t stop but then he pushed me away and I stumbled backwards. 

“What the hell Declan. You can’t just kiss me when you have a boyfriend. Leave.” He opened his door but I wouldn’t move. 

“I don’t have a boyfriend. We broke up. I couldn’t lie to myself anymore. Couldn’t make myself pretend to love someone else.” I whispered. 

“Declan I can’t do this. You keep pushing and pulling me in every direction.” He started to say and I walked up to him grabbing his hands into mine. 

“I have loved you since you were a freshman. I have loved you through everything we have been though. I have loved you every day and every night for years. You are in my thoughts and my dreams. I can’t stop thinking of you. I Love you Silas and I don’t think I can ever stop.” I told him with hope in my eyes until he pulled away from me and shook his head no.

“Logan.” He started and I suddenly got mad.

“What about Logan?” I spat out.

“He asked me on a date. I told him yes. I have to try. You got to try with Damon. I should get to try. I need to find out if I really do love you or if I can actually move on Declan. You put me through so much. I have to do this. I’m sorry. I just have to.” Silas told me, making me move towards his bedroom door. I nodded my head and just bolted to my room. 

I can’t believe that I became friends with another backstabber, damn Logan. I should have stayed with Damon and kept my heart locked. I would have been happy with him. I could have been happy with him. I threw myself onto my bed and cried. 

The next several days were hard. I made sure I ate and slept because I didn’t want to scare my parents again. I didn’t want Silas to decide to be with me because I was an idiot and ended up back in the hospital. I wanted to show him I was strong. I can protect him. I know I shouldn’t but until he is actually going out with Logan I tell Silas I love him every time I see him. I see the spark in his eyes, I know he wants to say it back. 

They are on their first date tonight and I hate it. I hate waiting up for him to see how it turned out. I planted my Mom down stairs to find out how he is when he comes inside. Silas finally came walking in the door and I heard him talking to my mom. They were down there for a little while and I was hoping she was consoling him from having a bad time. When I heard him go into his room I left and went down to talk to her and find out what happened.

When I entered the kitchen I saw my mom look at me with sorrow. I knew that wasn’t a good sign. I took the seat in front of her and she handed me a glass of chocolate milk. It was really bad news. I drank this only when I was upset. 

“He likes Logan doesn’t he?” I asked looking into my glass. I felt her take the hand I had on the table. 

“I’m sorry my baby boy. He does. He seemed really happy when he came inside. that was before he saw me. Then his smile dropped. I told him I knew he must have had a good time and everything was alright. The smile came back. You have to let him try. It is only right. You know it is.” She told me. 

“ I know. He told me the same thing when I told him I love him. I just... It’s hard. I’m going to have to sit here and watch him slip away from me. Why can’t I be happy?” I asked her.

“You have to try to move on also Declan.” I frowned at her.

“I tried. I really did. I can’t. I have loved him for years and it isn’t going to change. I’ve tried before, Before I even talked to him. Now I have talked to him. I have kissed him. I have held him in my arms. He sleeps under the same damn roof and I can't even have him love me. I need to get away. Mom I need to go somewhere away from here. He is protected here with you and dad. You can watch him, you can help him. Please. When school starts back up after break I want to transfer.” I pleaded with her. I had to get away. Away from Silas. These last couple months have almost killed me. 

“Oh my darling boy. I will let your father know and we will set it all up. If that is what you really want. It will have to be the boarding school in the town over since you can stay there until breaks. You will have two months until their first break in March. I will miss you so much.” She cried and gave me hug,

“I will tell Silas. We have a couple days left of break. I will tell him tomorrow and Leave the next day. This way you can call tomorrow and set everything up while we are talking.” I gave her a hug and went to bed. 

The next morning I woke up and went right to Silas room. He let me in after his smile fell and he placed his phone down. He must have been talking to Logan. 

“I need to talk to you.” I said and sat down in his chair.

“If this is about Logan.” he started and I stopped him.

“No. I know you like him and your date was good. This is not about that.” I said looking into his eyes I loved so much.

“Then what is this about, You're scaring me.” He looked at me. 

“I’m leaving tomorrow. My mom is setting me up at the boarding school in the next town over. I won’t be back until March.” He went to say something but I held my hand up. “I have to do this. I have to just be away. I hope Logan treats you right.” I stood up and went to leave but he grabbed my arm before I could. 

“Please don’t go. I don’t want you to go because of me.” He said. 

"I have to go, Please understand.” I said taking his hand off my arm. 

“I love you Declan. I will always love you.” He said, starting to cry.

“I believe you. But I wanted to hear that before you got with Logan. You have a chance to move on with him. Take it. This will give you the chance to try. If by any chance you still feel this way in March let me know. If not I will be happy for you.” I didn’t let him say anything I just left and went to my room and started to pack. I was leaving tomorrow and I wouldn’t see him for another three months. 

The next day I got into my car and said goodbye to my parents. Silas ran out just as I was driving away, falling to the ground calling out to me. This was for the best. He would have a chance to move on and be happy. He deserved that much. Maybe in March things will be different but I will not keep my hopes up and just concentrate on school. Stay single and live my life. He may not understand right now why I did this but one day he will. Never make a bet, it will only end up breaking your heart.

Good bye Silas, I love you!


End file.
